


The Sword and The Quill

by MercurialMind



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, F/F, Fluff, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Romance, Slow Burn, Smut, minor Dorian Pavus/Male Inquisitor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-11
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2018-10-30 19:00:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 29,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10882989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MercurialMind/pseuds/MercurialMind
Summary: “You know, Cassandra, you should really talk to her about how you feel”, said Dorian and took a sip from his glass of wine.Cassandra stared at her glass absentmindedly while tapping her fingers against the table. “I know it is what I should do”, she told, “but I cannot even understand what this is, as I have never felt this way towards any woman before.” She drank from her glass and fell back on her chair. “I like men.”





	1. The Book

**Author's Note:**

> I will be adding tags as the story goes on. Also the rating might go up in later chapters.
> 
> Thanks to Luinquesse for beta reading ^_^  
> The Inquisitor appearing in this story also belongs to her.
> 
> Feel free to give feedback. It is always welcome :)

“You know, Cassandra, you should really talk to her about how you feel”, said Dorian and took a sip from his glass of wine.

Cassandra stared at her glass absentmindedly while tapping her fingers against the table. “I know it is what I should do”, she told, “but I cannot even understand what this is, as I have never felt this way towards any woman before.” She drank from her glass and fell back on her chair. “I like men.”

“I hear you”, said Dorian smirking.

Cassandra chuckled, a sound that was so rarely heard from her mouth. “I mean I always dreamt of a man who would sweep me of my feet. I have yearned for this since I can remember, but now it does not seem to have importance anymore.”

During the first few months of the inquisition Dorian and Cassandra had slowly gotten acquainted and spent more time together. They had started chatting by the campfire and little by little began sharing more information to each other about their lives. If someone had told they would become friends, Cassandra would have laughed at that person. She had not let Dorian close very quickly. At first, she had been quite suspicious about him since he was from Tevinter, but after giving a chance they both realized they enjoyed each other's company.

Dorian smiled knowingly while playing with his curvy moustache. He was sitting in his armchair, relaxed as always, one leg on top of the other.  
“Oh, come on. You must admit this Antivan woman has gotten you under her spell, and you are all but helpless in front of her.”

Cassandra let out a disgruntled noise while glaring at him.  
“You know always how to choose the right words to make everything sound incredibly tawdry.” She shook her head. “But even if this would be the case, how do you think any relationship would be possible as death lurks in every corner? I have lost many people I cared for. I do not wish Josephine to experience the same."

"I understand", Dorian said. "But, especially during time like this, you should take happiness where you can get it."

She sighed. "You are probably right."

\---

Cassandra had just finished her breakfast and was heading back to her quarters. They were going to leave soon to Exalted Plains for expedition with Inquisitor Lavellan. She decided to stop by Josephine’s office but felt suddenly butterflies fluttering in her stomach. She sighed hard. How this can even happen to me? She thought and knocked on the door. Right away she heard Josephine calling her to enter.

Josephine was sitting at her desk as usual, and a smile rose on her lips as Cassandra entered the room.

“Cassandra”, she said. “It is a pleasure. I was hoping to see you before you leave.”

Cassandra nodded stiffly but a little smile crept on her lips as she approached Josephine who stood up from her chair. “I wanted to tell you, goodbye, before we head out.”

“I am glad you did. I do have something that might interest you”, Josephine said and opened her drawer. She pulled out a book and handed it to Cassandra.

“What is it?” Cassandra asked when she took it.

“It is a romance novel written by a well-known Antivan author.”

“Why would you - I mean how did you - ?”

Josephine waved her hand carelessly in the air. “Let us say, I have quite an ear for rumors”, she told and leaned against her desk.

Cassandra frowned, a slight grunt escaping her lips. She was glaring at the book suspiciously. It was not because she did not want to read a book recommended by Josephine, but she felt exposed as her secret appetite for romance novels had gone out.

“Please, do give it a chance”, Josephine continued as Cassandra seemed incredibly doubtful. “I consider it to be most intriguing and much better quality than Varric’s romance series, though I do not wish to offend Varric in any way. I highly respect his penmanship. I am just not convinced about his skills in writing romance.”

Cassandra raised her eyebrows. “You have read them?” she asked suddenly curious.

“Only one of them”, Josephine answered, “It was hardly romantic for my taste. I prefer his crime series. I think Varric is at his best writing those.”

“I suppose I can give it a try”, said Cassandra and saw Josephine nodding for approval, maybe she saw something else in her eyes too, but it could have been completely her imagination. “I will be going then – and will see you in a few weeks.” Cassandra tugged the book against her chest. “It will be a long ride.”

“Please, do take care of yourself”, Josephine said as she took a small step closer to Cassandra.

Cassandra nodded, as she leaned unintentionally forward. However, she quickly stiffened and turned on her heels. “Thank you for the book.”

When she closed the door behind her, she felt the warmth rising on her cheeks.

\---

The journey to Exalted Plains was most annoying. Long days of riding and she disliked riding, horses in general. She was always happy as they finally stopped to set up a camp since it gave her an opportunity to retreat in the tent for the night, to read the book. She was certainly curious about what kind of book Josephine had handed her, thus the first night she completely skipped the discussions at the campfire and told she was all too tired and needed rest.

As she settled in her tent, getting comfortable on her bedroll and opened the book, she recognized it carried a slight scent of Josephine’s perfume which made her smile. Fast she realized her thoughts had wandered and got flustered all by herself, immediately finding it completely ridiculous for feeling this way.

She sighed and started reading. The writing was good; she could tell it fairly quickly. She was a fast reader, thus it did not take her a long time to be able to form a slight opinion on the novel. It was interesting, she would admit for now.

Every night she read a little. She was utterly surprised when she realized the romance in the novel was between two women. Her head began spinning right away with thoughts. Was this some kind of message from Josephine? Had she noticed her lingering looks and now had given her this book, because she did not know if Cassandra was interested? Abruptly, she laughed at herself. That was all very nice but completely fruitless speculation. She decided to keep reading, with growing curiosity.

This trip felt more annoying than any other they had previously been on. And it was only because she had an urge to return to Skyhold even though she did not know what she would say to Josephine when she next met her. She found it extremely hard to concentrate to the task at hand.

 

One day, when they had stopped by a river to fill their waterskins, Cole appeared out of nowhere as he used to do every now and then. Cassandra had already gotten accustomed to it, thus she only flinched a little and continued washing her face.

“Her hair braided on the neck, slight scent of flowers as she walks by. Joyful giggle that warms the heart. Try not to admit.”

“Cole!”

Cole sat calmly on a big rock just beside her. He watched the moving water as it run by them.

“She would say yes.”

Cassandra looked at his pale, still eyes nearly hidden by the hat too large for the man of his size, and said nothing.

Cole turned to look at her for a moment and then he was gone as quickly as he had appeared.

 

Dorian could not avoid noticing Cassandra’s disappearance every evening after their dinner. On one evening, he confronted her.

“I am just tired”, she explained once again and tried escaping behind the tent curtains.

“Don’t give me that utter nonsense, Cassandra”, he said seriously. “Something is going on. What is it?”

“It is nothing really, Dorian”, Cassandra said feeling suddenly uncomfortable.

Dorian looked at her with investigating eyes and maybe saw something he did not want to inquire further as he just said: “All right then. But if you have something in mind you can always come and talk to me.”

“I appreciate that.” This said Cassandra closed the curtains.

 

That night, the novel took a turn to more suggestive direction. It did not take long before she started feeling overly warm in the small space of the tent. She could not avoid thinking about certain someone while reading it, thus she had to cast the book aside and leave the tent in order to get fresh air.

Everyone had already gone to sleep when she put her head between the curtains and took a peek outside, thus she sighed with relief. As she sat in front of the cold ashes and watched the stars on the clear sky, she could not help but wonder if this was really it, the feeling she had. When she had started her journey with the inquisition, never would she have thought this to happen.

Honestly, she had never judged anyone according to their gender preference. By herself she had always been able to tell if a woman was beautiful but she had never really thought about them romantically. During her life, she had met many different people. Some of them preferred the same gender, some both, and some had no such interests at all. By this age, she had realized this had nothing to do with the personality or other such qualities of a person. She found herself thinking about Dorian who people knew preferring men, but no one disliked him for that. Sera liked women, and no one minded about it either. Even Leliana was known about her past relationships with both men and women. Still she succeeded to fear how she would be seen by others if she was to pursue with her feelings for Josephine.

Another thought creeping in the depth of her mind, was if she could even rely on herself anymore. How could she suddenly change this way? She had always liked only men even though she hardly had experience on them either, except for Regalyan, but it was so long ago. How could she suddenly have these thoughts about another woman? Other matter that worried her most of all, was if she had completely misled herself with Josephine and would destroy their friendship with her feelings?

She could feel her own heart pounding in the silence for the trepidation and delight as she thought about the moment she would see Josephine again. Whatever was to come out of this, she could not wait for their return to Skyhold.

The exploration took longer than ever. After Dorian’s approach she tried spending more time with the others in the evenings. The way Dorian and Shae sat shoulder to shoulder at the campfire, the way they looked at each other, made her smile with happiness. One evening, she saw Dorian smiling back at her over the flames. He had understood.

\---

It was one of those days when the sun hit hard, even though it was not yet midday. They were exploring the northern part of the plains and hunting for a white wyvern. Shae had told that Vivienne had requested him to get her the heart of a snowy wyvern.

“What does she need it for?” Dorian asked. “To my knowledge, it is not a common ingredient for any kind of a potion I know.”

“I did not want to inquire too much as I am not in so good terms with her”, Shae answered. “I am even surprised she asked this favor of me.”

They moved further and further in the Ghilan’nain’s Grove and soon they heard the sound of great wings above them. The growl made Cassandra’s hairs on her neck to rise, and she looked up already knowing what they were going to face. A high dragon flew over and landed in front them with a thunderous sound as it slashed through the air and crushed the rocks under its giant legs. It created such a wind they nearly fell on the ground from its impact.

“It is a Gamordan Stormrider!” Shouted Cassandra and started backing out. “We are not prepared for this. We need better armor to fight this one!”

Slowly they tried retreating from it, Cassandra in front, ready to shield anything that would come towards them. The dark purple dragon growled again, the very sound shaking the ground underneath. Cassandra swore under her breath while they tried together to gain distance to the dragon that moved closer and closer. It spread its wings, causing a whirlwind which started pulling them closer.

The others had succeeded retreating far enough to avoid getting caught in the wind, but Cassandra was less lucky. Even though she tried hard keeping herself grounded, she was pulled too close. The dragon took advantage and swung its tail towards her. She flew through the air as the hit landed on her, leaving her breathless, and it was the last thing she could remember before her vision went black.


	2. Wounded

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we go. 
> 
> Enjoy^^

“Cassandra! Cassandra!”

Slowly, she opened her eyes, and it took her a great effort as she focused to take in the surroundings. She tried recalling what happened and reached instinctively for her sword, but soon realized she was not in the grove anymore. Thank the Maker. However, moving like this made her flinch in pain. Something was clearly broken.

Dorian’s hand came to rest upon hers, and he laid her back down, onto the bedroll.

“Easy my friend”, he said smiling. “I am happy to see you alive.”

Cassandra looked around. The campfire was rattling cozily, some inquisition soldiers gathered around it, having a meal. She reached for her left thigh which was bandaged tight. “What happened?” She asked, but even breathing was hurting her.

“You took quite a hit”, Dorian said. “You will have another scar, a big one. Though you were lucky it did not cut the artery.

Cassandra let out a disgusted noise. "Like I needed another one." She already had one on the same thigh from years ago.

"The hit was so hard it also broke couple of your ribs. You will have to be careful for some time."

Cassandra grimaced as she tried moving again. “I want to get up." She was not a woman to lie down but one of action. The idea of being helpless filled her with desperation.

“But you will not, not now. You have to rest”, said Dorian a serious look on his face. “We need to get you back to Skyhold as soon as possible. You lost quite a lot of blood and you need a real healer. I am a necromancer after all. My knowledge of the magic you need is insufficient.”

Cassandra felt suddenly dizzy and she let her head fall back on the bedroll. “How did we escape?” She asked eyes closed.

“Well, it took some effort and distraction. Thanks to Cole, Shae and I were able to retrieve you from that grove.”

“Cole? Where is he?” Cassandra asked suddenly worried.

“He is alright. I think he has only some burnt hair on his neck.”

Cassandra smiled faintly. She was relieved. Even though she had been suspicious towards Cole in the beginning, now, she was growing somewhat fond of him. Though, sometimes he still managed to make her feel uneasy with his cryptic words.

 

The road back to Skyhold was a rocky one. She was placed in a carriage and spent the rest of the journey lying there, bored out of her mind. The pain on her leg was getting worse but still she requested if she could ride a horse instead.

“You must rest”, the Inquisitor simply told her.

“But I will go insane if I remain here”, she said and let out a disgruntled noise when her demands were once again rejected.

Sometimes, Dorian rode alongside the carriage entertaining her by telling funny stories and annoying her with arrogant comments which in the end made her chuckle.

“Think about it positively”, he said. “Now you can drink wine and relax.”

“I suppose. But the odds are high for me getting bored rather than relaxed.”

Dorian laughed. Then he made a thoughtful face. “So, let me tell you a story of a man my mother caught running naked around the house.”

When Cassandra raised her eyebrows, he clicked his tongue. “Tsk, tsk, it is not what you think.”

Cassandra rolled her eyes. She loved his scandalous tales, his fantastically dramatic interpretation of events.

“So do tell me this story of yours”, she told and let her head fall back on the pillow.

They were half a day’s journey from Skyhold when she started feeling strange. It was a late evening, and the others were heading to sleep except for Cole, who was keeping watch nearby. Disoriented and freezing, Cassandra felt her body trembling. It did not take long for Cole to react and alert the others. She started soon drifting off, back and forth, sometimes hearing the others discussing around her.

The wound was infected and she had a high fever. Through her hazy consciousness, she could understand, they were transporting her swiftly. Someone was riding through the night to reach Skyhold.

_Mud. Stuck in thick dark goo. Cannot move legs, neither arms. A blade, sharp as a tongue of a serpent. Hissing. Through the air. His head falling. Anthony!_  
_...No...rolling to her feet...black short hair, the face of...her own._

It was completely dark, unless you counted the little amount of light, a crescent and stars can give when riding through a forest. Shae and Tarlan, the red hart, moved like a storm through the darkness. Being an elf, Shae was able to follow the road better than anyone else in the party. His arm wrapped tight around Cassandra’s faint body, this redhead elven man pushed himself and his mount to their last strength to reach Skyhold in time.

 

* * *

 

It was all the noise carrying from outside, echoing within the courtyard that woke Josephine up. She put on her robe and left quickly her room to find out what caused a stir at this time of the night.

When she arrived at the main hall, she saw a glimpse of a body being carried past her. She met fast the eyes of Leliana who was standing at the doorway a worry on her face.

“Who is wounded”, asked Josephine as she reached for her friend.

“It is Cassandra”, Leliana said looking truly worried. “I heard they encountered a dragon.”

Josephine looked back where she had seen the people carrying her and took a step to follow. She could not say a word as they had all stuck in her throat like a ball she could not swallow. Leliana dropped a hand on her shoulder, stopping her. “She is being taken care of. Please, come with me.” Reluctantly, Josephine followed her to her office and sat down on the couch as Leliana instructed her. Silence surrounded them as Leliana lit the fire in the hearth while she stared at the emptiness.

Since the first day she had met Cassandra, there had been something. At the beginning she could not quite comprehend it, but soon she had realized, that warrior woman, in her eyes, was something more than just the Seeker, the Hero of Orlais.

Cassandra was brash, harsh, stiff, but also a friend, loyal, someone you could trust. She was determined in everything she did. And she was beautiful. Josephine sometimes found herself just resting her eyes on her jawline. She was amazed how well Cassandra always carried herself. There was a kind of silent grace in her that left Josephine in awe.

Only recently she had noticed Cassandra's eyes lingering on her. Or was that only because she herself wished it so? Was that rosy color on Cassandra's cheeks from training outside or a reaction to seeing her?

She startled from her thoughts when Leliana sat next to her.

“I feel useless”, she said. “I am incapable of helping her and - "

“Josie”, Leliana said taking Josephine’s hand in hers. “You cannot always control everything. But you can be assured Cassandra is in good hands. We have talented mages and alchemists among us. She will be fine.”

They sat the whole night in Josephine’s office, waiting for a message. Leliana had made sure they would be the first to know about Cassandra’s condition.

“I should have been more forward about my feelings”, Josephine said at some point of the night. She had buried her face in her hands and her voice was breaking.

Leliana stroked her back gently. “You can tell her when she wakes up.” She could hear Josephine sobbing into her hands. “You will have plenty of beautiful moments together.”

Josephine inhaled loudly and looked at Leliana. Tears were gleaming in her eyes and some had escaped onto her cheeks. "How do you even know she has feelings for me? I could be just fooling myself while she has no such interest.”

Leliana shook her head smiling. "Oh Josie, your head can be sharp as a blade when you deal with people, when it comes to politics, agreements and mingling through nobles. But you are such an innocent in matters like this."

"How can you say that? Her gestures have hardly been romantic."

"I have seen the way she looks at you when you talk, and the side glances in the war room when everyone else is concentrated in discussing matters. I am quite sure you must have also noted them."

Josephine sighed. "I have not dared to believe they would be what I wish them to be." She let her head fall back into her hands. "I am so stupid.”

Leliana brushed her black curls placing a kiss on the top of her head. “Now is not the time for self-loathing, if ever.”

The hearth had nearly gone cold and the sun was high when they woke up to a knock on the door. Josephine jumped but Leliana had already opened the door for the messenger.

“Lady Cassandra is stable now. She can be expected to wake up soon.”

Before anyone could say more, Josephine had stormed past the man and out of the room.

 

* * *

 

Cassandra felt a warm hand holding her own. It was soft and gentle. She tried opening her eyes, finally finding her way back to the waking world.

“Hello there”, she heard a soft voice greeting her as she blinked her eyes open. She felt the hand holding hers withdraw. As she focused on the person next to her, she saw a beautiful woman, with black hair falling down her shoulders in wild curls. Cassandra smiled faintly.

They looked at each other for long, causing Cassandra to swallow hard. Then suddenly, she flinched. She was still hurting badly. She supposed the mages could not do miracles.  
“Dragons, Maker take them”, she hissed between her teeth.

Josephine’s eyes moved onto her wounds which were well bandaged, neat and clean. Cassandra saw her shiver a little. Seeing Josephine like this, beautiful as she always was, but now so close. Her heart was aching, and it was much worse than the physical pain she was used to endure.

“You made my heart jump out last night”, Josephine said biting her lip.

Those generous lips, which had so many times captured her. Without realizing she licked her own, tracing Josephine's features with adoring eyes till she met hers. They were studying her. Her heart was racing and she cleared her throat.  
“We ran into some trouble”, she managed to say.

“I am happy that you - are somewhat intact”, Josephine said slightly blushing - or was it only Cassandra’s imagination? “I have missed you - I mean I -”, she swore something in Antivan under her breath. “I am glad to have you back.” All this time she kept on fiddling the ruffles on her skirt.

“Josephine”, Cassandra said quietly. It felt good to pronounce her name. She felt trembling inside but she had to ask since she could not keep going unknowingly.  
“I wonder if - “, she started with blood rushing on her cheeks, “if there is something more between us - or is it completely my imagination, which could be entirely possible.” She felt like a young girl trying to acquire such information.

Josephine glanced at her through those thick eyelashes. “I have wondered the same,” she told leaning slightly forward, the beautiful scent of her flowery perfume lingering between them.

To calm her nerves, Cassandra drew a deep breath but this caused her to flinch from the sudden pain at her side. She placed her hand on her ribs, grunting with pain. It was Josephine’s hand that gently came upon hers, brushing softly against her skin. Cassandra sighed, closing her eyes with relief.

Had the dragon not attacked her, none of this would be happening. It was a blessing in disguise. She would gladly endure all the pain caused by her broken ribs and the wound on her thigh if this was the result. As she opened her eyes again, Josephine leaned in, placing a gentle kiss on her cheek.

Josephine drew away but lingered just few inches afar, so Cassandra could feel her warm breath tickling on her skin.

“Was the book a message?” She asked curiously, nearly with a whispering voice.

Josephine seemed blushing again. “Partly, I suppose. But I do prefer those to Swords and Shields, honestly.”

A smile crept in the corner of Cassandra’s lips. In the end it had been quite intriguing to be the target of such gesture.

“Did you like it?” Josephine inquired quickly and Cassandra could only but laugh awkwardly.

“Yes – yes I did.”


	3. Recovering

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Should they just - kiss?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took some time to get this chapter out, but I hope it is worth waiting for ;) 
> 
> The chapter 4 is nearly finished, thus I will be posting it fairly soon.

“Their eyes lingered on each other. The faint smiles, telling more than a thousand words, but still they remained as they were. He was not specifically a handsome man, but it did not really matter since he was the man she loved, had loved for so long. Their eyes met once more across the room before she had to go, before it would all fall apart.”

“Why is it so difficult?” asked Cole. He was sitting legs crossed at the feet of Cassandra’s bed, listening as she read aloud one of the books of Swords and Shields. “Why don’t they tell how they feel?”

Cassandra glanced at him, over the book. “Sometimes things are not so easy.”

“But if they love each other?”

“They are not sure how the other one feels.”

“They would, if they told.”

“That is entirely true, Cole.”

Cole glanced suddenly at the door. “Light steps against the stone. Smell of food. It will be good.” Then he vanished.

Cassandra shook her head. Such a strange boy.

She shifted on the bed, tugging the pillows more comfortably behind her back. The effort made her grunt with pain. Then, she heard a knock on the door.

“Come in!”

It was Josephine, carrying a tray. “Good afternoon, Cassandra. I brought you some lunch.”

Cassandra smiled. It was the instant impact Josephine had on her. “Thank you, I am quite famished.”

“That is good to hear. I was instructed to bring you hardy food with a lot of meat in it. It will help you gain back your strength.” She laid the tray on Cassandra’s nightstand and took time to arrange the sheets on the bed. They shared a few side looks, and Cassandra could feel again the fluttering butterflies as Josephine moved around, ruffles rustling.

“How are you feeling today?”

“Quite fine”, Cassandra replied. Better now as you are here, she thought.

“I am happy you are recovering well.” Josephine kept on bustling around. She opened the curtains, letting in the natural light of the day. Cassandra was breathless for a moment. The sunlight played in Josephine’s hair, making it shine even more than usual. Her eyes followed Josephine as she moved through the room, and started arranging food for her.

“You must have work to do”, Cassandra told her. “I regret taking you from your duties.”

Josephine stopped for a second. “If you wish to be left alone, I will return to my desk, but let me serve you some lunch first.” Her eyes were studying her.

And of course her traitorous tongue had betrayed her. Cassandra sighed. “No, no, that is not what I meant. What I meant was that I do not wish to be a burden. I know you are quite busy.”

The smile returned to Josephine’s face. She handed over a plate for her and sat on the chair next to the bed. “I do have work to do, but I chose to take a small break to spend a moment with you. You are anything else but a burden.”

Cassandra was glad to have the plate in her hands, to have something to fiddle with as she was so nervous around Josephine. It was strange to be still feeling so, even though they both were aware of the feelings they had for each other. Perhaps that was it, what made everything more difficult. Before they had only been friends and had acted as such. Now, there was this thin twine they were gathering between them, twisting and twining, trying to reach the center of it.

Cassandra took a spoonful of stew. It was honest food, nothing special, but good and filling. She was really glad when Josephine started talking about matters she was currently attending to, paperwork mostly, but it filled the awkward silence starting to surround them. She listened to her, but was mostly drawn into looking at her over her plate. She was so beautiful, dark hair, smiling eyes, captivating lips. Her thoughts wondered, leaving Josephine’s voice on the background. How to go on from here? Should they discuss about it? Or should she just - just -?

“Cassandra?”

“Yes?” She startled from her thoughts, realizing she had been staring at Josephine for apparently quite some time. She felt completely flustered.

Josephine was blushing. ”You seem distracted”, she said with a slightly amused voice.

Cassandra cleared her throat and took another spoonful of the stew. She wished so hard to be blessed with a silver tongue.

 

* * *

Cassandra was ordered to stay in bed for several days for her great annoyance, and was relieved when the healers finally gave her the permission to start walking carefully. Thank the Maker. She would be finally able to do something else than stare at the roof and the four walls around her. Honestly, she would have left the room that day, no matter what the healers said.

It was not an easy task to get up from the bed, but she welcomed the warm bath prepared for her. She had not had a proper bath since she had arrived to Skyhold, and it felt like heaven to sink into the heat of the scented water, relaxing her aching body.

Cassandra was all bandaged up again, and was putting on clothes, when she heard a knock on the door.

“Just a moment!” She hurried the ties on her shirt, looked at the mirror, approved, and called in the person.

It was Josephine. She had taken a habit to visit her during her recovery, and Cassandra always took delight in her presence.

“Oh, you are up!” Josephine was happily surprised.

“The healers gave me finally a permission to take a little walk.”

They stood there for a moment just looking at each other, quietly, until Josephine broke the silence. “Would you like to - take a walk in the gardens?”

“That would be lovely.”

She moved slowly, favoring her left leg, trying to stay straight with the pain on her side. She let out a disgusted noise when they reached the stairs. Josephine offered her arm, and reluctantly, she accepted it, quickly realizing the delight in such contact with her.

There were only few people, focused on their own affairs, tending to the garden or sitting on the benches, engaged in discussions. Cassandra was happy to breath in the fresh air, the smell of the garden. It was not a blooming season for flowers, but the scent of green was nearly overwhelming after spending so many days indoors.

“You never really appreciate things until you are devoid of them”, Cassandra said to herself.

Josephine’s eyes were suddenly bigger as she glanced at her.

“Ah, I was only thinking how I missed fresh air - and I would love to go back to training”, Cassandra said with a sigh.

“I can imagine. You seem to be gaining back the color on your face.”

Cassandra smiled. “I must owe it also to the delightful company I have”, she said and suddenly felt flushed as she heard the words coming out of her mouth.

She saw Josephine blushing too. “So you are a flatterer after all”, Josephine told her, through fluttering eyelashes.

“Oh, I am not!” Cassandra felt a sudden need to defend herself.

Josephine laid a hand on her arm, slightly fiddling with Cassandra’s sleeve. “Cassandra, do not worry. Your secret is safe with me”, she said giggling.

Now she was teasing her. And Cassandra took great pleasure from it. They stood very close, Josephine’s hand still on her arm. She could feel the warmth of her skin through the thin fabric and it stilled her. Their eyes met, lingering on each other.

Then, Josephine cleared her throat and shifted. She lowered her hand and kept on walking. Cassandra blinked twice before following her. Her head was like a whirlwind of thoughts, not able to grasp at any specific one.

“I will be leaving tomorrow for Val Royeaux with the Inquisitor”, Josephine continued talking. “I have a personal matter to attend to and he is helping me with it.”

“Is everything well?”

Josephine sighed. “I am hoping this meeting will give me more information.”

Cassandra nodded. “If you need any help with anything - “

“No, no, do not worry about it. I only meant to inform you as I am to be gone for a week.”

Cassandra did not inquire further as Josephine did not wish to discuss the matter. They walked slowly through the gardens and around the battlements, talking about this and that, until Josephine had to return back to her duties.

As Cassandra ended up alone on the courtyard, she decided to find the Inquisitor. Even though she had been nearly unconscious during their ride to Skyhold, she knew he was the one to thank for her survival. She had not seen Shae in the gardens, where you could often find him tending to his herbs, thus she decided to stop by the tavern.

The tavern was swarming with people, which was not exactly what Cassandra was looking for. Still she tried her best to be social. Many people she had not seen since her arrival wanted to greet her and inquired about her condition. She was several times requested to tell the tale of the high dragon that had bested the Inquisitor’s party.

Iron Bull roared as he saw her. “We will kill that son of a bitch of a dragon”, he said with respect in his eyes, when he looked at Cassandra. “You should come and have a drink with me when you have time. I want to hear everything.”

While discussing with people, she saw a glimpse of the Inquisitor, upstairs at the level where Cole usually stayed. She excused herself and climbed slowly up. She could reach only the next floor before she saw Sera leaning against the rail.

“Cassandra! Not looking too bad.” She approached Cassandra in swift motion.

“Sera.”

“You better, right? Does it hurt much?”

Cassandra sighed. “I feel quite alright.”

“Bull, me and the gang, we gonna make that spiky fire-barfing bastard pay. We will kill it all proper, yeah.”

Cassandra smiled a little. “I appreciate that.”

She succeeded to withdraw herself from the discussion and headed finally upstairs where she saw Shae sitting on the floor, watching people downstairs through the railing. It was calm there, a place from where you could easily follow the happenings downstairs without being noticed.

Cassandra completely understood how someone with the duties and responsibilities like the Inquisitor would have a need to retreat from all the hustle. She would have probably done the same if she was in such a position.

“Inquisitor”, she said when she saw him. “May I have a moment?”

Shae raised his head to look at her. “Lady Cassandra”, he greeted her surprised, and stood up. “Of course.”

They sat down on a pair of crates. The continuous chattering downstairs carried up muffled, to where they were sitting. Maryden had started playing “Empress of Fire”.

“You look much better since I saw you last time”, Shae told her smiling.

“I suppose I do”, Cassandra gave him a tiny smile too. “I am truly grateful for what you did. If you were not as quick -”

“I know you would have done the same.”

“Still, I owe you my life.”

“I am truly happy to see you well. I hope you will recover soon. We all have been worried for you.”

“I am glad to know people I can trust.”

Shae smiled again. “In that way we are all very fortunate. It is one of our great strengths.”

 

* * *

The next morning, before Josephine would depart for Val Royeaux, Cassandra wanted to stop by her office to wish her a safe journey. Also, she just wanted an excuse to see her.

Josephine was happily surprised by her appearance. She inquired right away about her well-being, and Cassandra told she was feeling better, which was completely true.

“I wanted to wish you a good journey”, she told Josephine.

“Thank you.” Josephine was smiling. “We will be leaving in few hours. I still have couple of letters to write.”

Josephine was lovely as always, ruffles rustling as she moved around, swaying her hips, and Cassandra was transfixed by the sight. Slight color of pink rose on both of their cheeks as they spoke to each other.

"Ah yes, now I remember what I was looking for", Josephine said suddenly, moving amidst her bookshelves trying to find something. "There was one book I was searching the other day."

Cassandra watched her moving along the bookshelf and reaching for a book that was just out of her reach. Since Cassandra was slightly taller than her, she closed the distance between them and reached for the book. It hurt her side to make such an effort, and she winced a little. But she did not mind since it brought their bodies together in a way that she could feel her shape against her when Josephine turned around.

Cassandra tugged the book between them and blushed from the neck to her hairline since she suddenly felt too hot in her wear. She cleared her throat and tried taking a step backwards. However, Josephine had already grabbed her shirt and pulled her closer. Josephine pressed her lips against hers, and Cassandra had to take support from the bookshelf, effectively trapping Josephine between her arms. The book fell on the ground with a thud, and the shelf shook dangerously, making both of them laugh. Cassandra very fast regretted it as her ribs felt like aflame.

“Are you alright?” Josephine asked with a hushed voice. Since Cassandra nodded with response, they quickly returned in each other’s embrace.

The sunlight shimmered through the window to the corner where they were standing. Josephine had entwined her arms around Cassandra’s neck, her plans clearly not involving letting her go. So many thoughts passed through Cassandra's mind, she could not get a grip on any of them. But what was sure, it felt wonderful. Josephine tasted sweet, and her lips were soft and gentle. It had been so long since Cassandra had kissed the last time. She was eager, but fumbling, and it made Josephine giggle.

Cassandra let her hands fall onto the small of Josephine’s back where she felt the sweet curve of her body. Their kiss was heated, so much that they barely noticed when the door clanged. Of course, Josephine’s office was not private as it was located between the main hall and the war room. Suddenly, and extremely flustered, they broke apart trying to compose themselves, just in time to see Cullen enter in the room.

“Oh, good morning!” he said smiling as the women tried not looking at each other. “Josephine, I wished to speak with you.”

“At once”, Josephine said with a hurried voice and straightened her clothes as she walked towards him. “What can I do for you?”

“I suppose I will leave you to it”, Cassandra told and bowed her head slightly, for goodbye. “I will see you in one week.” Her mind was a mess, and she wanted to escape the room as soon as possible.

“Yes - in one week. Take care of yourself.”

“Is it warm in here?” asked Cullen looking at the women. “You both seem quite flushed.”

“I might have to open the window", said Josephine with a little smirk creeping in the corner of her mouth. "The sun is most powerful today."

 

 


	4. Adjusting

The days in Skyhold passed by slowly as Cassandra tried to recover from her wounds. When Josephine was gone, Cassandra was able to reflect on herself. She found herself quickly frustrated since she could not stay on her feet for long, could not attend to any of her general duties. She tried doing as Dorian had suggested; she drank some wine, read a book, tried unwinding. However, her thoughts tend to wander. The moment they had shared in Josephine’s office, before Josephine left for Val Royeaux, gave her a lot to think about. The heated kiss had woken feelings she had not felt since a very long time. And what was most intriguing, they were caused by a woman, and not just any woman, but exquisite Josephine, who had all these beautiful feminine qualities, something she had never craved for. She had always admired men with large shoulders and chest, with manly chest hair, big arms capable for carrying a woman.

Maker. She sighed. Did it really matter?

One morning, she woke up, her body all flushed, and too warm under her blankets. She could easily remember her dream and felt ashamed. Josephine deserved more than her feverous thoughts. But she could not help herself recalling the images of her dream. Thus, she had to get up and dip the head in the barrel of rainwater outside the blacksmith’s. It helped, a little.

 

* * *

  

The next time they saw each other was one evening when Cassandra was enjoying a game of wicked grace with the others in tavern. Josephine walked in with the Inquisitor. They had just returned from their trip and welcomed an evening with friends.

Their eyes met across the table as Josephine sat down, greeting everyone. Cassandra felt a warm flush go through her body when they exchanged a smile, subtle, only something they would notice.

The evening was pleasant, full of laughter and stories. It was warm and cozy, chatter filling the air, everyone enjoying their time. It was amazing, how in the midst of all the fighting and demons, they could find moments like this. And it made those moments even more precious.

  
“We have to get Curly to play”, Varric told, taking a gulp from his beer. “Ruffles, you are going to empty his pockets.” 

Josephine was really good at playing cards. Cassandra, on the other hand, always struggled in remembering the exact rules of the game. She admired Josephine’s wit and spent the evening adoring her, trying hard not to get caught by the others.

The hour was late when they walked out of the tavern. The moon was high, accompanied by bright stars against the dark blue sky. The air was chilly on the mountains at night, and Cassandra wrapped her arms around herself, trying to stay warm. People were chatting loud and focused on discussions, thus it gave the women a chance to catch a moment together.

Josephine followed Cassandra to the blacksmith’s building, which was now empty of workers. The usual clanging of metal had gone silent for the night. 

As they closed the door, Josephine laid a hand on Cassandra’s arm. Cassandra turned to look at her eyes, dark, in the dim light of the forge. Her heart missed a beat, so lovely she was. 

“I cannot forget our last encounter”, Josephine said fiddling with Cassandra’s shirt. Then she giggled. “I spent the whole week thinking about you.” 

Cassandra swallowed. A scene from her dreams flashed in front of eyes and made her blush. “I thought about you too.”

Josephine’s hand came upon her ribs. “Are you still hurting?” she asked with a sweet voice. 

Cassandra felt her hand through her shirt, warm against her bruised side. “I am feeling much better”, she said, “even though, I would love to recover faster.” 

Josephine was so exquisite, so close, and Cassandra’s heart was pounding hard. Josephine caressed her cheek with her other hand, making Cassandra to close her eyes, to lean into her touch. 

In the red light, warmth of the forge, they kissed. It was unhurried and indulgent. Cassandra felt her back pressed against the wall, Josephine’s wonderful body all over hers.

 

* * *

 

It was couple of days after Shae and Josephine had returned when Cassandra crossed Dorian in the tavern, drinking. It seemed he had taken more than usual. 

“My lady Cassandra”, he said and waved his hand from the corner, calling her to approach. 

“What is the matter, Dorian?” She grabbed the bottle from the table and glanced at the etiquette. “Alvarado's Bathtub Boot Screech. Where did you even find this?”

Dorian just smirked.

“This is not typical of you, to be drinking something like this.”

“Oh, do not mind me”, Dorian said and poured a glass for her. “I just have to get my brain straight.”

“If I may tell you, this is hardly the way to do so”, she told him a frown on her forehead. “And no, thank you.” She pushed the glass away from her.

“Please, sit down. I want to tell you something.” 

Cassandra decided to do as requested. She had to help herself with her leg as she sat down gingerly.

“So, Shae comes to me with this gift”, Dorian started right away. He took a sip from his glass and continued. “Well, I skip to the part where I went to his chambers afterwards, thinking to give him something in return.”

Cassandra shifted in her chair. “Dorian, this is –“, she said but Dorian interrupted her with his hand.

“And that was it. It did not go as I planned. He did not want it. Instead he wants a relationship. A relationship! I mean, I really like him, but never in a million years would I have expected to end up in a relationship. In Tevinter, if it’s two men, you just have sex.”

Cassandra rubbed her forehead. She was not sure what to tell him. 

“What am I going to do as I have no reference to which to compare? How does one go about having a relationship?” 

Cassandra looked at this man who was always so well-groomed but now his hair was hanging on his sweaty forehead and he already smelled like the day after a party. She was hardly the one to give advice in a matter like this.

“Is this something you want - a relationship?” she ended up asking.

Dorian took another sip, grimaced and sighed. “That’s the thing. I do actually, and it is damn frightening.”

“I understand.”

“You and Josephine - how is it going?” Dorian asked lowering his voice. Even though, as in stupor as he was, he was tactful enough not to shout it out loud. 

“Well, I cannot yet tell where it is going”, Cassandra said feeling uncomfortable.

“Come on, tell me something.” Dorian smirked. 

Cassandra glared at him, frowning. “Such as?”

“Have you kissed?” 

“As a matter of fact, we have.”

Dorian clapped his hands. “Excellent!” And right away he raised a finger on his own lips. “Shhh.” 

Cassandra huffed and stood up from her chair. “You should drink a lot of water and sleep it off”, she told him with a serious face. “And stop drinking that swill!” She threw the words at him, as he, once again, took a sip of that abominable drink.

 

* * *

 

The Inquisitor’s party including Dorian, Sera and Blackwall departed for Western Approach, leaving Cassandra behind to heal her wounds. The twin Hawkes and Alistair had already left one week in advance. Cassandra was happy she did not need to sweat herself to death on the desert, but she missed the action. Even if she could not do physical work, there was always something to do at Skyhold.

“I do not understand how you have patience with all these politics and agreements”, Cassandra said once as she was visiting Josephine in her office. Josephine spent most of her time there; even now she was buried under a fifty page agreement with Merchant princes of Antiva.

“Most of the time I do enjoy my work, but I must admit, it gets frustrating time to time.”

As she and Josephine adjusted to their budding relationship, she felt happier every day. It was a feeling she did not recall from her recent past. Her life had been so grim until now; duties, the inquisition, fighting, death. Josephine was a sunshine enlightening the days. An incredibly beautiful one.

Josephine was, however, quite busy at her work with inquisition matters, thus spending a moment together was somewhat rare. When they could catch a moment together, they spent it by walking around the battlements, talking.

Cassandra was also very timid about showing affection towards her, especially in public. She was struggling in her head constantly, trying to find out how to deal with the situation. Josephine, however, seemed content.

When Cassandra was strong enough to stand several hours straight, she continued training the inquisition troops with Cullen. This was something she was familiar with and enjoyed it, even though she could not yet wield a sword herself.

 

On one afternoon, as she was once again out on the field, outside of Skyhold, following the soldiers training, she heard a horse approaching. Then the joyful voice with a strong Antivan accent called her name. A smile rose right away on her usually serious face.

“Josephine!” She was happily surprised to see her.

“Cassandra, could I have a moment, please?” Josephine asked jumping off her horse. Cassandra could not avoid thinking again, how beautiful she was with the hem waving around in the air when she landed on the ground.

“Of course.”

Josephine tied her horse on the tree nearby, then Cassandra led her behind the barracks where they could speak privately.

“I would like to ask you something”, Josephine told looking suddenly nervous. It was all very romantic actually. They were standing under a tree, branches full of leaves falling down to hide them in their embrace. The wind playing in Josephine's hair. It was like from one of those books. Cassandra approached her so they stood only inches afar from each other. 

“What is it?” she asked and slightly brushed her fingers against Josephine’s hand.

“Well, I was wondering if you would like to have dinner with me tonight.”  Josephine was blushing now.

“I would love that.”

“Not in the tavern, but in private”, Josephine continued seemingly searching something in Cassandra’s eyes. “I could arrange an agreeable meal in my quarters, and it would allow us to spend some time together which we have not –“

“Yes”, Cassandra interrupted her and by that, surprised even herself. “I mean, that would be lovely.”

“That is – wonderful”, said Josephine smiling. She lingered a moment, just enough for Cassandra to swallow hard.

Cassandra glanced around. No one could see them where they were standing, hidden by the building and trees, thus she dared to pursue with her feeling to kiss Josephine. It was just a small one, directed on the sweet curve on the corner of her mouth, but it seemed to have a greater impact on the other woman than she had expected. When Josephine walked back to her horse, her steps seemed lighter.

So she was to have dinner in Josephine’s quarters. What was expected of her? As she instantly smelled herself after spending time at the training grounds all afternoon, she decided that a bath was required, definitely. But was she supposed to bring her something? This was all new for her again, but even though being nervous, it felt good, butterflies.

 

When the evening arrived, she was all clean after bath. She dressed up in dark leather pants and a loose, white linen shirt. After considering a moment, she decided to excavate her bottle of perfume from the deepest corner of her drawer. She did not remember ever using it, but now it felt like the perfect moment. She had gone to the wine cellar where she and Dorian usually picked up the best bottles and had decided one of them would be suitable for bringing along.

When she finally stood behind Josephine’s door, it took her a moment to gather her courage to knock. She had never been in Josephine’s quarters before. But as she finally succeeded to knock the door, and Josephine opened it, she felt suddenly content again.

Josephine was beautiful as always, but she looked different tonight. She had raised her hair high on her head with some strands falling loose from the chignon. She wore a red skirt and a cream colored shirt, with ruffles of course. She did not, however, wear her usual grand necklace.

“You look very – nice tonight”, Cassandra managed to tell. She realized staring at her and got completely flustered, blushing from the neck to her hairline. The way it made Josephine smile, caused Cassandra’s heart to miss a beat.

“You are beautiful as well, Cassandra”, Josephine told her, eyes smiling beneath those thick, black eyelashes. 

Cassandra handed her the bottle of wine. "I thought to bring this for you as I know it is an excellent one."

Josephine took the bottle happily smiling, however she smirked a little. "So it is you, who has been drinking the wine from the cellars? Somehow I do not believe that it is you alone, am I right?" 

Cassandra chuckled a little. "It is not in my honor to reveal my partner in crime." 

"I see", Josephine told squinting playfully. "I have a quite good idea already."

Since Cassandra stood still, watching her surroundings, not daring to take a step further, Josephine decided to take her hand, leading her further into the room. Josephine had furnished it in a way that it looked very Antivan. At least, that was how Cassandra imagined Antiva to look like from what she had heard of it. It was warm and cozy, something that allowed Cassandra to feel at ease. The fireplace was burning on the right, creating a lovely ambience, with a very comfortable looking couch in front of it. There was a coffee table between them, filled with all kinds of food, smelling absolutely delicious.

"I am sorry", Cassandra said suddenly. Josephine raised her eyebrows, wondering. "Because I always appear so stiff in front of you. But I hope you will not take it badly. I am just adjusting."

Josephine cupped her cheek smiling. "You must not worry", she said. "I do understand, and that is why I also wanted us to have this moment together. No one else, just us."

Cassandra appreciated highly how Josephine seemed to understand her. She was so sweet, which was one of the reasons she had all these feelings for her.

“What are all these?” she asked as she was led on the couch. 

"They are some Antivan specialties", Josephine told. "I made requests to have them for us tonight." 

As Josephine sat near her, on the couch, she could not help but think how it was all so different from what they had done before. It was very romantic. They were finally able to spend time together, far from prying eyes. She shifted suddenly as Josephine's thigh brushed slightly against hers when she moved to fill two glasses with wine. 

They had fresh bread, olives, cured ham, different kinds of cheese Cassandra found extremely exotic but delicious, They also enjoyed a plate of delicious stew with foreign spices. They discussed and laughed. Cassandra felt good, comfortable. She enjoyed every time Josephine touched her hand while talking. She was sure Josephine did not even notice doing it, but it was a slight gesture which assured her. 

“You should have seen her face when she entered the room. I could have sworn she was going to scream, but she did not. She just walked out of the room and closed the door like nothing happened.” 

Cassandra loved listening Josephine's stories about the time she was studying in Val Royeaux, and about her family, the life in Antiva. 

"Your stories are amazingly colorful", she told her.

"Thank you. It is a pleasure.”

“It is so strange”, Cassandra said suddenly, watching the fire. “We both have large families, going far in history. However, where you seem to love it all and enjoy everything the big family brings along, I could not care less for the Pentaghasts.” 

“What about your family?” Josephine asked. “I do not recall you actually mentioning them before.”

Cassandra was surprised she was not more familiar with her past. 

“It is not something I enjoy discussing with people in general”, she told, suddenly turning to her usual seriousness.

“Oh, I did not mean to be intrusive”, Josephine said, sounding worried, and Cassandra quickly dropped a hand upon hers. 

“No, it is not that. You did nothing wrong”, she said. “You are one of those people I would gladly share my past with.” As she did this, Josephine seemed relaxing again.

“So, my family? I was born to Mathias and Tigana Pentaghast as the younger child of the family”, she started. “I had an older brother, Anthony, who was very dear to me.” She sighed a little when talking about them. Josephine stayed silent and still, just watching her as she spoke. “My parents died for trying to overthrow King Markus. I and Anthony were only children at the time, thus we were spared. My uncle took care of us after their death. Vestalus, he is a Mortalitasi, too much interested in dead people, if you are to ask my opinion. Anthony was mostly the one taking care of me. When Anthony died, I had nothing left in Nevarra and I joined the Seekers.” 

“I had no idea – “, Josephine said, her face very serious. “Is it too much if I ask what happened to your brother?” 

“Anthony”, Cassandra said her eyes traveling somewhere far. “He was a great dragon hunter. I admired him the most. Once we encountered a group of blood mages who demanded Anthony to kill a dragon for them, for the blood. He refused, and they killed him for that, in front of me.” Cassandra's eyes gleamed with tears and Josephine moved closer, so she could hug her. 

“I am so sorry.”

“It is alright. In a way, it feels relieving to talk about it”, Cassandra told. “But it is not a story I tell to entertain people.” She wrapped her hands around Josephine and sighed. “It was a long time ago, but it still hurts. I miss him greatly.” 

They sat like this, against each other for the very first time, Josephine's head against her chest. She could smell her hair, feel the warmth of her body, and something melted inside her. 

“Are you not afraid?” she asked. 

“Afraid?” 

“Of caring for someone - caring for me.” 

Josephine rose herself to look into her eyes. “I am not. Are you?” 

Cassandra was silent for a moment. “Yes, I think I am”, she said barely voiced.

Josephine’s hand stroked her arm. “Tell me about it.” 

“I have lost so many in my life. I find it very hard to give in. Death is all around us, and something bad could happen anytime. It does not mean I haven’t yearned for romance since years, very very long time, but I never thought it would actually happen.” 

Josephine was looking at her with adoration. “I think I understand what you mean. And I truly hope you dare to give us a chance, Cassandra.” 

Cassandra brushed Josephine’s silky hair. “Never has a woman made me feel this way.” She was very surprised of herself, and for talking so freely of such matters, but she felt comfortable, safe with Josephine, here and now.

“Does that bother you?” Josephine asked, her voice not changing a tone. 

Cassandra searched her feelings. For a long time she had been bothered by it, but now? 

“No, it does not”, she said and cupped Josephine’s cheek with her calloused hand. “You are the sweetest thing that has happened to me.” 

Josephine smiled to such confession. Cassandra let her thumb gently brush the side of Josephine’s lips. Slowly she approached and pressed a kiss on them. It was a warm, lingering one, which made her heart flutter. She reached for Josephine's neck and pulled her gently closer, pressing them into even more intense embrace. Her other hand sought for a place and found one just on the small of her back. 

Encouraged by Cassandra's kiss, Josephine dared to move her lips down her neck, behind her ear. Her lips softly brushed Cassandra's sensitive skin where she placed a kiss. Cassandra let out a sigh which made her blush, but she did not care. She only cared for Josephine and her beautiful presence around her. 

That evening was a small journey of discovery. They shared kisses, heated, but soft and gentle. Their hands wandered, traveled across their clothed bodies but did not inquire further. When they stood at the doorway, later that evening, they kissed again, an unspoken promise. 

It had to be midnight when Cassandra walked across the courtyard back to her lodgings, over the forge. She placed her fingers on her swollen lips where she still felt the heat of Josephine's. Her heart beat faster as she tried thinking where all this was going.

 

 


	5. Hurting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cassandra is hurting after the events of Caer Oswin.

They had only recently returned from Adamant Fortress. Alistair had sacrificed himself for the others, and there were multiple casualties caused by the battle.They had just said farewell to the fallen ones, and were still recovering from all the events at the Fortress, when Leliana approached Cassandra. The lost Seekers had been found.

 

* * *

 

Tears were falling down her cheeks as she cradled herself on the bedroll, over the forge. She had wrapped her arms around her knees, sobbing, secretly, hidden by the sounds of clanging metal carrying from downstairs. They had just returned from Caer Oswin, and the whole ride back to Skyhold, she had tried to keep herself in one piece. Crying was not something she wanted to be seen doing in front of others.

The book of Seekers lay on the floor, next to her, and time to time, she glanced at it with disgust. She had read the book while their travel back home, and there was too much to take in right now, so many things to consider. The Seekers were not at all what she had always thought them to be. And Daniel, poor Daniel.

She heard steps on the stairs and stilled herself. The last thing she wanted right now was to talk with someone. She saw a glimpse of fabric through the railing and turned around on her bedroll, to look at the wall.

_Josephine._

“Cassandra?” Josephine’s voice was soft. 

Cassandra sniffled. She did not want Josephine to see her like this. But Josephine did not go away. She approached her, kneeling on the floor beside her.

Cassandra trembled. She was hurting, aching from inside. Repeatedly, she saw images of Daniel, his eyes red, asking her not to leave him, begging her to take his life, so he would not turn into a monster. She saw her own hand, gripped around the sword handle, the blade slashing through the air. His body, laying on the cold stone.

She shuddered and inhaled unsteadily. Josephine’s hand, hesitantly, touched her back, and started making circles, causing her to sigh. She closed her eyes, tears still falling down her cheeks.

“I do not wish you to see me like this”, she said with a broken voice.

“Nothing will turn me away from you, Cassandra.”

Cassandra remained still, her back stiff and her mouth but a straight line. She pressed her lips hard together, as though she could keep the tears from falling that way. She was barely breathing, shudders going through her body as she tried to hold in the tears.

Josephine reached out for her hand and held it tight. The hand that was always so soft and warm, felt also firm and assuring. They sat in silence, few inches afar from each other, for a long time. Josephine’s presence soothed her, and slowly, her back began to relax, but she was still sobbing silently. Hesitantly, she turned her head to look at Josephine. Her face was hot, and her head hurt from crying.

“Daniel did not deserve to die like that, forced on red lyrium, killed by his own mentor.”

Silence.

Cassandra sighed hard. “He was my apprentice, a good young man, with a bright future ahead.  Lord Seeker Lucius forced red lyrium on him. It had already taken his body, and I had no choice. I could not leave him.” She stared at Josephine pure fright in her own eyes. “I killed him.”

“He was already gone”, Josephine told, gently brushing Cassandra’s knuckles with her fingers. “It was Lucius who had taken his life. You let him go in peace.”

"Once again, a person close to me dies”, Cassandra uttered and inhaled unsteadily. “I should have been there to protect him. He was so young, and Lucius used him, just like he used the rest of the Seekers.” She spitted out the last words, cursing Lucius’ name. 

“You cannot blame yourself for their fate.”

They sat in silence again. She squeezed Josephine’s hand, too strong for a moment, until she realized she might be hurting her. “I am sorry you saw me like this”, she said then, releasing her hand.

“Goodness, Cassandra. Have you not realized how much I care for you? Do you seriously think this would make me think ill of you?”

Cassandra remained silent.

“You are the strongest person I know.” Josephine took Cassandra’s face between her palms and looked at her burning eyes. “But know this; you do not have to be always strong. You are an incredible woman, someone I see going through any obstacle in life. But do not push me away, please, don’t you dare doing that!”

Cassandra swallowed. She pressed her own hand upon Josephine’s, closing her eyes. Another tear fell down her cheek, onto Josephine’s dress.

“You are such a good person, Josephine. Sometimes I doubt I deserve you in my life.” 

Josephine shook her head. “Such foolishness, Cassandra”, she said sighing. “You are a wonderful woman, and it is about time you realized it yourself.” She put her arms around Cassandra, and Cassandra responded to her embrace, hugging her tight in return, sighing with content. She was so sad, but somewhere deep inside she felt happiness, somewhere where Josephine held her heart in her beautiful and gentle hands.

 

* * *

 

They spent the evening sitting on her bedroll. Josephine had brought a tray of food with her as she knew Cassandra had skipped the dinner. Reluctantly, Cassandra accepted the nourishment, even though she did not feel hungry. There was a thick slice of bread and cheese, and a bowl of stew smelling truly appetizing. In the end, Cassandra was pleased to eat it all, realizing she had actually needed food after all. Furthermore, Josephine smiled with satisfaction as she scooped the bowl clean. After the meal, she laid her head in Josephine’s lap, amidst her ruffles. She let Josephine gently caress her temples, to bury her fingers in her short hair, and it was incredibly soothing.

She must have fallen asleep, as for she opened her eyes, there was only the dim light of a single candle in the room. Her head still cradled on Josephine’s lap, she raised her eyes to look at her. Josephine was concentrated in reading a book, but fairly quickly startled as she realized Cassandra was looking at her.

“You are beautiful”, Cassandra said and shifted herself to sit.

Josephine smiled, one of her adorable smiles, which made Cassandra want to kiss her. Thus, she cupped Josephine’s face and placed a gentle kiss on her cheek.

“What have you been reading?” she asked curiously.

“I picked one of the books you keep on the stand.” Josephine showed the cover to Cassandra. It was a book of poems, famous love poems.

“You chose well”, Cassandra said smiling.

“How are you feeling?”

Cassandra sighed a little. She felt still very sad, but the headache was gone. “Better.”

Josephine smiled and gently caressed her cheek before looking out of the window. It was completely dark outside.

“It is very late. I should finish some work before going to bed. I still have to plan on few favors for Du Paraquette family.” She sighed. “Will you be alright?” She kissed Cassandra and stood up, straightening her clothes. She laid the book back on the stand, lingered a short moment looking at Cassandra, and Cassandra wanted to hold on to it. She reached for Josephine’s hand, gentle but firm.

“Stay”, she said. Her voice was clear, without hesitation. The way Josephine’s eyes lit, made her heart flutter.

“You wish me to stay a night?” 

“Yes.” 

Josephine sat back down on the bedroll, smiling widely. “I suppose my work can wait till tomorrow.”

Cassandra glanced around. “I must apologize. The accommodations here are not great -”

“Hush.” Josephine placed a finger on Cassandra’s lips. “It is perfect.”

 

* * *

 

Cassandra removed the top layer of her clothing, so she wore only her undershirt and pants. She helped Josephine take off her dress, so she would feel more comfortable for the night, besides it would rustle unpleasantly while sleeping. She looked really cute in her underdress, Cassandra remarked, and smiled at her, causing Josephine blush slightly under her gaze.

“Would you like if I read aloud some of the poems?” Josephine asked as they were settling on the bedroll.

Cassandra raised her eyebrows surprised. 

“There were some truly beautiful ones”, Josephine continued, smiling.

“I would love that.”

They lay down on the bedroll, and Cassandra pulled up the blankets to cover them. The workers downstairs had stopped their work, but the heat of the forge warmed well her loft. Still there was always a slight draft upstairs, thus it felt wonderfully warm under the blankets.

Josephine took the book of poems she had been reading earlier, and took a moment to find a specific poem. When she began citing it, Cassandra could do nothing but to still herself and listen. Her voice, thick with Antivan accent, and her rolling tongue on the words, made her smile. She loved those poems, and even more as she heard them voiced by Josephine. 

Sometimes Josephine glanced at her, well aware that Cassandra was staring at her. It made Josephine stumble in her words which Cassandra found adorable. The sadness, Cassandra had felt earlier, was now a distant pain as she looked at Josephine and listened to her voice. It would take time for her to mourn Daniel; she would need to talk with the Inquisitor about the Seekers; she would need to find out how to deal with everything. But for now, all that could wait.

When Josephine finished reading, they faced each other on the pillow, and Cassandra brushed a strand of hair falling down Josephine’s cheek.

"Ah, I forgot to undo my chignon", Josephine said suddenly, sitting up.

"Josephine", Cassandra said faintly. "May I?" She adored Josephine’s hair, and this was something she had wanted to do for a long time.

Josephine's eyebrows rose with surprise, but she nodded smiling and turned around.

Seeing Josephine's neck exposed in front of her like this, only inches afar, gave her an urge to touch it. She raised her fingers, slightly caressing the skin on her slender neck. She did not think, only felt her own lips press a kiss on it. She smelled the scent of Josephine's skin, which she could not describe with words, and Josephine shivered slightly under her touch.

“You were supposed to undo my hair, Cassandra”, Josephine said with a voice smooth as silk.

Cassandra blushed and moved her hands onto her hair. Carefully, she began undoing the braids, letting the freed hair fall down on her shoulders. When Josephine’s hair was falling all in wild curls, she turned back to watch Cassandra and pressed a kiss on her lips.

“Now, you need to sleep”, Josephine said withdrawing herself. She laid her head against the sole pillow they shared, and Cassandra landed softly beside her. They smiled at each other, and Cassandra felt content. When she put her arm around Josephine’s waist, pulling her closer, she felt the warmth and softness of her body against her own, and closed her eyes.

“Good night”, she whispered.

“Good night”, she heard Josephine say with her sweet voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for Commenting and Kudosing^^


	6. Afraid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cassandra searches her feelings when faced with Josephine's arranged engagement to another.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a while since the last update, but here I am again with a new chapter. ^^
> 
> Thanks to wonderful Luinquesse for beta-reading!

She smelled the air, humid with evening dew, rich with the scent of flowers of the garden. She listened to the crickets in the high grass as they danced like the people in the ballroom. The evening breeze stroked gently her cheeks. Cassandra was glad to retreat from all the fuss happening inside and took delight in the solitude, the balcony offered her.

The Inquisitor had succeeded to make Empress Celene and Briala work together. They had avoided an assassination plan and saved the Empress’ life. The Inquisition had succeeded to strike a blow against the Corypheus. Even though Cassandra did not always agree with the Inquisitor, she respected his choices, and even now, she was glad that things had worked out.

Nevertheless, she felt worn out after the evening. So much mingling with nobles, so many gossips, and the game itself was something she loathed. The best part till now had been the moment when she had discussed with Yvette, Josephine’s sister. Yvette was quite a character, but it had been such a delight to meet a family member of Josephine’s. 

Josephine had tried hard to stop Yvette from telling stories about her. When she, however, succeeded to blurt out that Josephine still played with her doll collection, Josephine had been mortified. Cassandra, on the contrary, found it absolutely adorable and completely believable.

“Is everything alright?” 

She must have looked exhausted when Josephine approached her. Still a slight smile appeared on her lips as she saw the beautiful woman coming close to her.

“It has been a long night.” 

“I suppose it has, but I must say, tonight was a triumph. The Inquisitor can be proud of his success.” Josephine seemed to be energized by the environment. She was in her element in parties like this, surrounded by intrigue, ready to use her wit.

Cassandra nodded. “The sooner we return back to Skyhold, the better.” She had got enough of the ball. “I can’t believe you abandoned me earlier. This fat Count insisted on talking about soup for fifteen minutes once you had left.” She was pouting at Josephine.

Josephine raised a hand to brush her cheek. “My poor Cassandra. Is there a way I can make it up to you?” 

Cassandra could hear the flirtatious tone in her voice, and her eyebrow rose a little. “I do not know, is there?” 

“Maybe a dance?” Josephine asked, playfully tilting her head. 

“A dance? I do not dance.”

“Oh, I am sure you do”, Josephine held out a hand for her to take. 

Cassandra huffed. “On you may be the consequences if I step on your foot.”

Josephine laughed. She put her arm tightly around Cassandra’s waist and pulled her close while Cassandra placed a hand on her shoulder and smiled a little.

“Let me lead, and we will be fine”, Josephine giggled as she started to move along with the song, they could faintly hear carrying from the ballroom.

Cassandra cleared her throat. It felt incredibly pleasant being in Josephine’s arms as she carried her across the balcony.

“I suppose this isn’t terrible”, she said.

* * *

 

It was soon after their return from Halamshiral when Josephine approached Cassandra on her way from the war table. 

Josephine’s eyes were red with dark circles around. “Cassandra, I have to talk with you”, she said, looking very much uncomfortable. Had she been crying?

“What is it, Josephine?”

Josephine took her hand and led her on the settee in front of the fireplace. She did not let Cassandra’s hand go and stared at it absentmindedly. Cassandra looked at her, baffled.

“Cassandra, I do not know how to tell you this -”

“What is the matter?” Cassandra was getting nervous and worried.

“I am engaged”, Josephine said caressing Cassandra’s knuckles, not looking at her.

“You what?” It took several seconds for Cassandra to register what Josephine had actually told her.

Josephine raised her head to look at Cassandra. “During the past year, my parents have been looking around Antiva, trying to find a match for me.” She stood up and swore something in Antivan, which Cassandra could not understand. She began pacing around the room while trying to explain the situation. ”I just received a letter telling that I am now betrothed to Lord Adorno Ciel Otranto. He is from a good family, with great connections. On paper, he seems like the perfect match for me.” She turned her eyes towards Cassandra. “Cassandra, my parents had no idea we had become so - close.”

Cassandra’s stomach twisted unpleasantly.

“I will have to take care of this, but I am afraid, we cannot be seen together in an uncompromising situation, until I succeed to solve this.”

“But Josephine - are you telling me, we should act like there is nothing between us?”

Josephine’s voice was breaking. “No - not at all, but it is not right that we carry on while I am betrothed. I must break off the match first.”

Cassandra did not know how to interpret all the emotions flushing through her body. The things they had experienced together until now, everything passed through her eyes, and her heart beat faster as she felt the all so familiar feeling, fear, seep into her. She stood up and grabbed Josephine’s shoulders, staring directly into her amber eyes. “I will not lose you to some nobleman.”

“You will not”, Josephine told placing a hand upon hers. “Let me take care of this.”

* * *

 

Later on that day, Cassandra was smashing the dummies with a little more anger than they would deserve. Josephine engaged to some Lord. That was outrageous. She slashed the dummy, sliced again and again. When she thought about her future, she tried envisioning her and Josephine together, and it felt good, it was something she wanted. And now Josephine was promised to some Lord, who knew nothing about her.

Then it crossed her mind. There was a way to break the engagement, and she could do it. She stilled for a moment. The idea of Josephine in some nobleman's - in any other person's arms than hers was unbearable. But to duel the Lord? It would be public, very public.

 

That night as she lay on her bedroll, alone in the loft, sleep evaded her. Her mind was full of thoughts, images of Josephine, possibilities which she did not wish to come true. She could lose Josephine, the woman who had captured her heart, who against all Cassandra’s previous assumptions about herself, was now the one she visioned spending her future with. It was cruel that this could be taken away from them. 

How would it be seen if she was to pursue with her idea? Their relationship would be placed for everyone to see. But how else than by having her duel with the Lord, could Josephine rid herself from this unwanted marriage?

Cassandra did not sleep that night. When the sun rose above the horizon, she was out at her duties. She kept following her routine, tried having a meal, trained, but nothing could really take her thoughts away from the matter. It was an early evening when she was frustrated enough, so she threw her sword on the grass. She stared at it, furiously, for some time, sweat running down her temples. Finally, she let out a disgusted noise before picking the sword up again. She placed it on its rack and marched towards the main building, up to the library.

* * *

 

It had been quite some time since she and Dorian had spent time together, and she felt guilty about it. She found him at his usual place in the library, skimming through the collection of books.

“Ah, Cassandra”, he greeted her with a smile “What a surprise to see you here.”

Cassandra huffed. “I know, I have been neglecting our friendship. I apologize.”

Dorian waved his hand in the air. “Don’t you worry about it. You are here now. I know you have been busy attending to your lovely friend Lady Ambassador.” He smirked.

Cassandra did not say a word.

The book Dorian had been reading, closed with a thud, and it made Cassandra jump.

“Hmm?” Dorian looked at her questioning.

Cassandra frowned and shifted her weight from one leg to another.

“Would you like to attend counselling, along with some wine?”

“I suppose that would not hurt.”

“Ah, but very well then.”

And so they took the stairs to the wine cellar of Skyhold.

 

They did not bother with table and chairs. They dragged together some crates and sat in silence for a long time. Cassandra was thankful for Dorian’s patience as it took a full glass of wine for her to start speaking, which startled Dorian as her voice suddenly echoed in the stone cellar.

“I am sorry to come to you only now, when I need help”, she said with a little voice.

“Like I already told you, it is alright. We all have our duties that take our time. So, talk to me, please.”

“Josephine is engaged”, Cassandra sighed.

Dorian placed his glass on the crate. “So the rumors are true.”

“The rumors?”

“Well, news like that travel fast. I heard about it in a letter I received from an acquaintance few days ago.”

Cassandra let out a disgusted noise.

“How did this happen?” Dorian asked.

Cassandra took a big gulp from her glass. “Josephine’s family had no idea about our relationship”, she said with a shuddering voice.

“I understand”, Dorian said rubbing the back of his head. “Well then - there are ways to break a match.”

Cassandra stared at the glass in front of her. “Josephine is working on something on her behalf, but I do not know if it will be fruitful.”

Dorian took a sip from his glass, leaned against the cool stone wall and let his head fall back. “Oh, these noble family matters. No matter how far you travel, you can never truly escape them.”

Cassandra buried her face in her hands. “I am afraid”, she whispered. “I am afraid to lose her.”

Dorian looked at her frowning. “But this matter is not only in her hands. You know you can do something about it as well.”

“I know.”

“What is the matter then?”

“What will people think of me, of us, and the Inquisition, if I am to involve myself in a matter like this?”

“What will people think?” Dorian chuckled. “A notion I too am very familiar with, I have to admit.”

“But I thought your relationship with the Inquisitor is well.”

“It is”, he said nodding. “But I must admit being worried about how other people will see us. Shae tells me often: Vhenan, you worry too much. People will always talk, no matter what.”

“How do you do it then?”

“I have no choice. I love him. There is no other I could imagine spending my life with.”

Cassandra was silent, but her mind was racing with thoughts.

Dorian looked at her smiling. “You care for her more than you dare to admit to yourself.”

Cassandra sighed. “I know it is what I want. My heart yearns for her. She is wonderful, and I want to be with her.”

“Then you know exactly what you must do”, Dorian smiled and tapped her on the shoulder.

* * *

 

They drank a lot. Cassandra could not remember the last time she had enjoyed as much of liquid relief. However, it felt good to be numb, even though only for a moment. The anxiety and the storm of feelings, raging through her body, were silenced, at least for one night.

As they went on and on with discussions, jumping from a thing to another, it was the wee hours of the morning when she finally crawled up to her loft and fell on her bedroll. The world was spinning and she felt nauseous. She closed her eyes, but it did not help, making her regret right away the amount of wine she had poured into herself. Ugh.

When she finally fell asleep, it was dreamless, sole blackness. Too quickly, the morning light woke her up, and she covered her mouth as she rushed out, behind the building to pour out every last thing she had in her.

How very shameful. 

Her head was banging hard, like vomiting was not enough to remind her from the last night. Her eyes were sensitive to the sunlight, and she crawled back to her loft, followed by the side looks the workers downstairs gave her.

She had not realized earlier, a glass of strange green liquid and a note placed against it, on the stand, next to her bed. She frowned as she did not like the idea of someone sneaking to her loft while she was asleep.

 

_Be the brave warrior, I know from the battlefield, also in the matters of love._

_PS. Here is something to fix that inevitable horror you are experiencing._

_\- D_

 

She smiled, but it turned quickly to a grimace and a groan as she took a sip of the liquid. She could not decide which was worse, the taste of her own vomit or this. Reluctantly, she grabbed the glass again and drank it all. After all, she did not believe Dorian would try to poison her.

As she lay back down on the bedroll and closed her eyes, she swore to Maker not to get herself to a same kind of state ever again. Nevertheless, it had felt good to vent out to Dorian.

Even though she felt nauseous and needed more sleep, as soon as the miracle potion Dorian had crafted for her, began to help, she stood up and grabbed a quill and paper.

With quick strokes she wrote the challenge for the duel.


	7. The Duel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes the woman just has to take the sword in her hand and fight for their love.

 

As much as she loved to see Josephine, it was equally upsetting. They both felt awkward because of the situation. Cassandra kept the duel challenge a secret. She did not think it wise to mention it as she was afraid it would create an argument. She was to do this and did not want anyone to question her decision. 

All those days, as they saw each other, they shared side glances, but never truly spent a moment alone, avoiding a compromising situation. Cassandra wished so much to kiss Josephine, wished to pull her close and feel her soft body against her own. But Josephine kept her distance as she did not want to destroy the reputation of hers or Cassandra’s.

It was one evening when most of the people were already asleep except for Josephine, when Cassandra found herself pacing in front of her office. She knew it was against Josephine’s wishes for her to visit, but she wanted to be with her. She let her fingers trace the shape of the door knob, her other fist clenching as she thought it through again and again.

The door squeaked as Cassandra, slowly pushed it open. She saw Josephine raise her eyes from the parchment she was working on and lay the quill on her desk.

“Cassandra?” Her voice was soft but wondering. “It is very late. I am surprised you are not asleep.”

“I could say the same to you”, Cassandra told her voice low. She felt the tension build in the room the moment they laid eyes on each other.

Josephine did not reply. She watched as Cassandra took the slow steps to her desk and around it. As Cassandra stood in front of Josephine, she stopped to look at her. She was so close, she could have reached a hand to stroke her hair, or to caress her cheek. But she did not have to, since Josephine stood up. Her dress rustled as she moved, her hands reaching to stroke Cassandra’s arms, their eyes lingering on each other.

“Josephine”, Cassandra whispered. She wrapped her arms around her waist and bent her head to place a kiss on those soft lips she had missed all these days they had kept apart. Josephine hummed with approval but withdrew eventually from her touch.

“Cassandra, we cannot be seen like this.”

“There is no one to see us”, Cassandra told her voice husky. “It is such torture not able to be together. Let us have this, if only this moment, and I can go on another day.”

Josephine’s hand rested on Cassandra’s cheek, thumb brushing gently over her lips. There was a conflict in her eyes, which Cassandra could clearly see. When Josephine slowly rose on her tiptoes and pulled her back into a fierce kiss, Cassandra’s heart began racing. She stumbled, and they fell on the chair, Josephine’s soft and warm body beneath her. Cassandra’s muscled legs straddled her, her hands diving in the depths of Josephine’s dark curls. Her tongue passed through parted lips, the softness and sweet taste of Josephine’s filling her. 

Josephine’s hands traveled up Cassandra’s sides, her fingers curling into her shirt. For a moment they were both lost in the sweet sounds of each other’s breathing, the taste of lips and tongue, the feeling of bodies pressed together. And then, it was gone. Josephine was panting under her, dark curls falling down her face. 

“Please, Cassandra”, she whispered. “Let us stop now. We cannot, not like this.”

Cassandra withdrew herself, standing up in front of her. Her breathing was frantic, her lips pulsating from the heat she still felt on them.

“Believe me, Cassandra, I nothing but want to be with you, I want you, I have wanted you for so long. But I cannot as I know I am betrothed to another. I must break the match first.”

Cassandra’s voice was hoarse. “I am sorry. I did not mean to -” She swallowed and took Josephine’s hand in hers. She stroked it gently and placed a kiss on her knuckles, lingered a short moment as  they looked at each other. 

“Cass…”, it was barely a whisper that left Josephine’s lips.

Gently, Cassandra let go of her hand and turned on her heels, not looking back as she walked out of the room and closed the door behind her.

* * *

On one afternoon, as Cassandra was once again hitting the dummies, Leliana approached her.

“So you are going for duel”, Leliana sang, leaning against the tree next to where Cassandra was training. “I am quite pleased to hear this.”

“How did you - oh, never mind.” She would always wonder Leliana’s ways. She kept on hitting the dummy while Leliana spoke.

“I came here only to tell you how happy I am for you and Josie.” Leliana stood straighter and walked closer to Cassandra who stilled herself. “She is like a sister to me, and I consider you as my friend, I am sure you know this.”

“I am aware of that, yes.”

“I have great respect for you and I think there is no other who I would more gladly see beside her”, Leliana continued.

“Oh, thank you. I appreciate that.”

“I also expect that you will treat her with kindness, for her and your own sake”, Leliana added.

And there it was. Eyebrows knitted together, Cassandra looked at the blue eyes, which refused to give away any thought.

“Of course I will.”

Then the expression of Leliana’s changed. She had, suddenly, this smug smirk on her face. “And I think you too are adorable”, she cooed, and before Cassandra could give any response, she was gone. She watched at Leliana’s back and huffed.

_ Adorable _ .

Although, it made her smile.

* * *

When Cassandra, finally, received the message confirming the duel, which would take place in Val Royeaux in four days, Cassandra run to her loft and packed quickly. Without further notice, she was on her horse and out on the road.

The journey took forever, or at least she felt so. It was her determination driving her closer to the destination. She had to stay in inns for the nights, but could hardly find sleep. She turned around in the bed, sleepless, imagining her encounter with the Lord. 

When she finally arrived to Val Royeaux, it was busy and monumental as always, and she began feeling even more nervous than before. Too many butterflies for her taste. It was the first time she was feeling so nervous before a fight, which she found completely ridiculous. Maker, she had fought against dragons and demons after all. This was just one man. 

The duel would take place at midday the next day, thus she had to stay one more night at the inn and wait with growing anxiety. She did not doubt her skills, but she did not have much experience in the noble style of sword fighting. She might look quite barbaric beside Lord Otranto. But Maker take her, she was going to do this.

* * *

Next morning, she dressed up early and headed to the chantry. She had not slept at all and needed to calm down before the duel. It was a peaceful place, where she would always find the quietness in herself. Nevertheless, it had been quite some time since her last visit to the Maker. 

She approached the altar with a calming heart and in silence, kneeled in front of it bending her head. She held her hands together and breathed in the air filled with the scent of countless burning candles, letting the silence surround her. Closing her eyes she entered her mind, only her and the Maker. 

_ Maker, I am your servant, seeking your guidance. _

_ Let me not fall into the darkness, but walk in your light. _

She saw the faces of all those she had lost during the years past. The memories, floating and disappearing as she tried holding on to them. She saw herself clearly. Her existence, all her traits, nothing less, nothing more. Then, Josephine. 

She emptied her mind from thoughts, breathing in, breathing out, the way her Seeker training had taught her. She did not know the actual time she spent like this, before coming back to herself. 

_ Yours is true the path I walk on, _

_ matters not how I came to be. _

_ There, only by my own hand, _

_ solely by my own will, _

_ I shall find my way. _

* * *

When the sun was high, she was ready. There was a big, noisy crowd gathered around the main square of the Summer Bazaar. She was slightly nervous, but much less after her visit to the Chantry. People started whispering when she stepped on the square, but she did not care.

Lord Otranto arrived soon after her. As they saw each other, he bowed his head. “I am Lord Otranto of Antiva the rightfully betrothed of Lady Josephine Montilyet”, he stated courteously. 

Cassandra let out a silent disgusted noise, but bowed her head for the courtesy. She stood straight, with all her dignity and grace.

"Stories of you have reached me, Lady Seeker, the Hero of Orlais. It is humbling to make your acquaintance.” He threw a sword into Cassandra’s hands. She took it calmly, staying still and silent. 

This man with black hair and stubble, could have even been handsome in her eyes if she was not too occupied imagining him on the ground, begging for his life. 

She could not avoid herself from thinking of this man with his arms around Josephine. She took several deep breaths trying to focus to the moment and not get distracted.

“It is a pity it will not last longer", Otranto continued.

He talked too much, Cassandra thought. Even though, she tried looking calm, she was boiling inside.

They turned around each other, measuring the situation. “Let us begin”, Lord Otranto said finally.

The metal clanged as they started dueling. Cassandra was at home with the sword. For her frustration, she did not have a shield this time, even though she was imagining bashing the man with one. It started well and Otranto commented: “An admirable start, Lady Seeker.”

Cassandra let out a disgusted noise. Flattering was the last thing she wanted to hear right now. She made an offensive move. 

“I knew I would have a worthy opponent, when I heard I was challenged by you”, he continued.

This man was arrogant, and she would use it for her advantage.

“I am glad Lady Montilyet isn’t here, exquisite as I’ve heard her appearance to be.”

Cassandra was getting enough of his chatter. The metal clanged again, blades slashed through the air. Lord Otranto gained advantage for a moment, pushing his blade towards Cassandra’s face. She grimaced. The man was strong, she admitted to herself, but she would not falter.

“Cutting you down in front of Josephine would’ve given a poor first impression of House Otranto to my bride.”

“You will not touch her!” She pushed him away and swung her sword cutting a wound on his arm. She raised her sword to another swing, ready to cut off the full arm if necessary.

“Stop!”

The voice stilled Cassandra. They both lowered the swords and turned to look as Josephine rode with a horse in the middle of the crowd. She was dressed up in a travel coat and leather breeches, her hair escaping from her chignon, flowing in wild curls in the wind.

“Josephine!” Cassandra gasped of surprise. Even in her wonder, she could not ignore how beautiful Josephine was, how raw she looked out of her finery, and felt a surge of warmth go through her heart.

Josephine threw her legs over the horse and landed on the pavement. Lord Otranto approached her. “Lady Montilyet, what a pleasure to - “, he started but Josephine walked past, ignoring him.

“What are you doing?” Josephine shouted pointing a finger at Cassandra, who had never seen her angry like this before. 

“Me and Lord Otranto are settling some differences”, Cassandra said with determination, even though her voice shook slightly from the piercing look Josephine was giving her.

“It is not your decision!” Josephine yelled at her again. She turned herself away from Cassandra, sauntering on the pavement. ”The Inquisition needs you. I need you. Yet you throw yourself into danger.” She turned to look back at Cassandra and stared right into her eyes. Her voice was thick with Antivan accent, even more as she was angry. “Why do this? Why risk everything we have built together? Why risk your life?”

Cassandra looked at her fiery eyes. “Because I love you!” She gasped a little as she heard herself say the words, becoming suddenly stiff as the sword in her hand.

Josephine’s face enlightened at that moment, her eyebrows rising up. Suddenly, there was no anger left in her voice. “You - you do?” 

Lord Otranto looked at Cassandra with the same astonishment as Josephine. “She does?”

Cassandra did not break the eye contact with Josephine as she hit the sword on the ground, the blade entering the pavement. “You heard me”, she said blushing a little. 

"I love you too", Josephine told smiling and quickly, closed the distance between them running into her embrace. Cassandra swung her around and kissed her deeply, warmth filling her heart.

“Well-fought”, Otranto interrupted them, honoring Cassandra with a bow. Blood was dripping through his shirt where she had wounded him.

“Lord Otranto - “, Josephine started, but he kept on talking.

“I’d assumed your liaison with the Seeker was an affair of passion or convenience, Lady Montilyet.” He sheathed his sword. “But I am not a fool enough to stand in the way of true affection.”

Cassandra saw Josephine glancing at her quickly, with a smile in the corner of her lips.

“The house Otranto regretfully withdraws the terms of our betrothal.”

“Thank you”, Josephine said with a voice full of relief.

“Do not thank me”, Otranto said bowing and turned on his heels.” I know when I’m outmatched.”

As Lord Otranto left the square, the crowd which had been following the duel, finally started scattering around, leaving Cassandra and Josephine standing alone in the middle of the square. Josephine took Cassandra’s hands into her own.

Cassandra’s mouth was but a straight line as she tried forming her next sentence. “I apologize for arranging the duel without telling you”, she told, “but I had to do it.”

Josephine was investigating her eyes. “Given that you are in one piece, body and soul, I forgive you.”

Cassandra smiled faintly, wrapping her hands around Josephine who leaned into her touch.

“Do kiss me again”, Josephine told with a smile that could melt even the hardest of hearts.

And so she did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has not been beta-read so I hope there are not too many mistakes. 
> 
> (I used several direct quotes from the duel scene in the game, thus I cannot take credit for them.)
> 
> Many thanks to all of you who are reading this story <3


	8. Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the duel, Cassandra and Josephine begin their journey back home and stop at an inn in Lydes. They spend their first night together after a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is unbetad as well as the previous one.  
> Also, I had to change the rating. E, just in case. I hope this is not a bad thing.

 

That evening, as they arrived to an inn in Lydes, even after the whole day of riding, they did not feel tired. It had been the loveliest trip Cassandra had ever traveled. The looks they had exchanged through the day and the words they had told each other warmed her heart and soul. 

Cassandra felt slightly shaken by everything. She could barely believe the lord had actually withdrawn the betrothal. Now, their relationship was as public as it could be since she had openly professed her love to Josephine in front of the full crowd of people. But there were no regrets. She would never forget how Josephine had looked at her when she had spoken the words. 

And Josephine loved her back. Josephine Montilyet, this wonderful woman, loved her. She glanced at Josephine’s beautiful profile as they walked from the stables towards the inn and saw the smile on her face. Her own heart jumped with joy, and her steps felt lighter than ever before.

They ate a quick dinner downstairs, their feet touching slightly under the table, Josephine’s hand lingering upon hers. The way their eyes met when they joyfully discussed about the events, made her think of all the things she wanted to do with Josephine, later that night, in their room upstairs.

“I must say, you were quite dashing”, Josephine told smiling, drawing out a blush on Cassandra’s cheeks. “But I was sure you would cut the lord in half.”

“Maybe not exactly in half.” 

Josephine tilted her head seductively. “You have no idea, how dangerous you look with a sword in your hand.”

Cassandra chuckled. “When I need to be.” 

Josephine’s look grew serious for a moment. “But I must admit I was truly frightened. You cannot imagine how angry I was when I discovered you had left for Val Royeaux not saying a word.” 

Cassandra smiled a little. “I think I have quite a good idea.”

“Yes, I might have shown you a hint of it”, Josephine smiled. “But you should know that even though, as frightening as it was, that was still the most exciting thing I have seen in ages.” 

“You do realize what the Inquisition has been doing?” Cassandra asked raising an eyebrow at her.

Josephine giggled. “Let me correct myself...the most romantic gesture anyone has ever done for me.” 

Even though, Josephine’s words made Cassandra smile, she could not help thinking of the other side of the consequences. “How will your family take the news?” She asked, becoming very serious. “After all, you are the heir and supposed to have children of your own.” 

Josephine looked thoughtful for a moment, and when she spoke, a smile was curving her lips again. “I will send a letter to my parents as soon as possible, to avoid rumors finding them. If I am to know my parents well enough, they will be pleased after a short consideration. They do know my fondness towards both men and women, thus it will not be a surprise for them that I have found love with a woman. Also, they do care for my happiness before everything else. Besides, you are a princess of Nevarra. How could they refuse such a union?

Cassandra huffed. She did not usually like to be referred with that title, but it did not bother her now. If that was one of the helping factors in their relationship, then let it be so. Furthermore, Josephine sounded so certain, thus it made Cassandra feel calmer. 

“And what comes to children”, Josephine continued, holding Cassandra’s hand tighter. “It will be something between us. Nothing says we cannot have children of our own. I do not care whether they would be my blood or not.” 

Cassandra looked at Josephine’s hand holding hers, and smiled again. The thought of them one day having a family of their own, even the possibility of such, was enough to make her heart swell with happiness.

“I would not mind about that either”, Cassandra said looking into Josephine’s eyes which burned bright at her words. Cassandra sighed. She took Josephine’s hand in hers and held it tight. “I can hardly believe this is true. You cannot imagine how much the idea of you in the arms of another made me sick.”

Josephine smiled endearingly and brushed Cassandra’s cheek with her soft hand. “I would never willingly accept to be in any other person’s arms than yours, Cassandra.” 

She tugged at Cassandra’s hand, standing up. “Let us retire to the room. It has been a long day, and I would be glad to lay down somewhere more comfortable.”

They paid for the dinner and ascended the stairs to their room. As they entered, Josephine lit a candle next to the doorway.  “I will light the hearth”, she told rubbing her arms. “It is chilly in here.” 

While Josephine hurried with the fire, Cassandra let her eyes wander. Aside from the fireplace, the room had simply a chest in the corner, and a bed, not very large one. They would need to sleep very close to each other not to fall from it, and a faint smile crept on her lips as she thought of the night ahead of them. The last time they had spent a night together was when Josephine had comforted her after her journey from Caer Oswin. It had been sweet, and she felt her heart quicken by the thought of sleeping beside Josephine again. 

When the hearth was lit and burning, fire eating the wood, slowly and rattling, Josephine took the steps to close the distance between her and Cassandra. She let her arms circle Cassandra’s waist, slowly raising her eyes to look at her. “This has been a wonderful day”, she told smiling and nuzzled her head into Cassandra’s neck. 

Cassandra sighed. She wrapped her arms around Josephine and hugged her tight, closing her eyes. As they withdrew from the embrace, Josephine got on her tiptoes and pulled her into a kiss. Josephine was warm against her chest, her touch gentle, fingers lingering on Cassandra’s neck. 

When they broke from the kiss, Josephine cupped gently her face smiling endearingly. She took Cassandra’s hands and led her towards the bed. “Come here with me”, she told gesturing to the bed and sat down, pulling Cassandra to sit beside her. 

In silence, they removed the boots and scooted further on the bed. As Cassandra lay on her back and stared at the roof for a moment, she sighed with comfort. 

“Ah, this is wonderful”, Josephine whispered, nuzzling her head against Cassandra’s shoulder.

As a wonderful contrast to the coolness of the room, Josephine was warm against her side, her hand lingering on Cassandra’s waist.

“When I first laid eyes on you at Haven, I hadn’t an inkling we would become so close.” Cassandra could feel Josephine smile against her neck, her words warm on her skin.

“Once I realized I was attracted to you, I did not believe you would ever respond to my feelings”, Cassandra told. 

Josephine rose slightly to press a kiss on Cassandra’s lips, her weight shifting partly on her. The feeling of Josephine’s body pressed against her and the deepening kiss, made Cassandra feel suddenly very nervous. Her heart beat faster, and she stiffened against Josephine’s touch. 

Josephine had felt the shift and rose to look at her. “Cassandra, is everything alright?”

Cassandra sighed. “Yes.”

Josephine smiled, her beautiful eyes looking at her. “What is it? You seem suddenly very tense. Please, tell me if something is wrong.”  

Cassandra bit her lip and sighed again. She felt ridiculous for being nervous like a young girl. Her thoughts made her body tingle with desire, but she had never been with a woman before, that certain way, and it made her feel truly awkward.

“There is nothing wrong. I want to -”, Cassandra began, and stopped as she felt the heat rush onto her cheeks. She brushed Josephine’s chin with her thumb and let it slide across her lips, so very soft lips. “I want to make love to you...but I feel so ridiculously inexperienced.” Oh Maker, she had actually said it aloud. 

Something flashed in Josephine’s eyes, and Cassandra could see her white teeth as her broad smile was directed at her. Josephine hooked her hand around Cassandra’s wrist and kissed the fingertips. “My sweet Cassandra”, she murmured. “You do not have to be experienced. No one ever is when being together for the first time.” She placed a kiss on Cassandra’s cheek. “We will find our way together.”  

“I only wish I could offer you more”, Cassandra sighed.  

Josephine let Cassandra’s hand slide upon her chest, where Cassandra could feel it rising and falling with an increased pace.  

“Amore mio, there is nothing I want more than you, as you are.”

Cassandra looked at Josephine’s beautiful eyes and the honesty in them. Thus, she gained the courage and pushed herself forward, against Josephine’s soft lips and kissed her with passion. Josephine let out a sweet approving sound humming into Cassandra’s mouth. It was a heady, open mouth kiss, not soft and gentle but fierce with all the feelings they had for each other. 

Hands wandered across clothed bodies, fingers lingering on the soft skin of the neck, brushing over the swell of breasts, discovering the curve of hips. Cassandra got pushed upper on the bed, towards the headboard to lie against the pillows, and Josephine followed her, straddling her hips, her sumptuous body all over Cassandra’s. Her nimble fingers were quickly on Cassandra’s shirt, beginning to unlace its bindings.

“May I?” Josephine asked, biting her lip as she looked into her eyes. 

“Yes.” It was more of an exhaled breath that escaped Cassandra’s lips. 

Josephine, mouth slightly open, with a smile in the corner of her lips, began unlacing the shirt. As she undid the ties, she placed a kiss right on the corner of Cassandra’s jaw and moved down slowly with lingering lips, along the path of exposed skin.

Cassandra could do nothing but to arch herself to the touch of Josephine’s warm lips against her sensitive skin. She felt all her senses growing stronger. She smelled the wonderful scent of Josephine's skin and hair, heard her breathing, felt it on her skin. The sweet weight of Josephine’s body pressing on her, rushed the heat between her thighs, every touch lit a flame inside her.   

Her own hands sought for the laces of Josephine’s blouse, and with fumbling fingers she began to undo them. It took a moment for her to untie it, as well as the beautifully embroidered corset Josephine wore underneath, but when she finally let it loose and saw Josephine’s ample breasts in front of her, her breath shuddered.

“You are so beautiful”, she husked and saw the blush rising on Josephine’s cheeks. 

Obviously, she had seen women naked before, on her travels. She had seen them change their armor, bathed with them on the road. But she had never seen Josephine stripped from the layers of clothing. As she hesitated, Josephine took her hands and pressed them firmly against her warm skin. A surge of pleasure went through Cassandra as she felt the beautiful shapes against her palms. Heart racing she brushed her thumbs gently over the nipples and pressed her lips against Josephine’s dark, silken skin, drawing out a sigh which caused a shiver go through her own body. She placed kisses on the freckles Josephine had right on top of her shoulders, and then, kissed her mouth again. Their bodies were brought together, and Cassandra could feel the swell of Josephine’s breasts against her, warm and wonderful. 

She shifted, pushing Josephine on her back, onto the sheets. Josephine squealed by the sudden change but smiled at Cassandra who hovered over her. Cassandra let her shirt fall down on the bed, wearing now only her breast band, and Josephine looked at her with adoration.

She lowered her body to kiss Josephine on the mouth first, then on the hollow of her throat. Her skin was so sweet, so soft, and her own breath frantic on her. She traveled down slowly, kissing the valley between her breasts, feeling the heat building within herself. She let her mouth and tongue travel across the breasts, hesitating slightly, and then circling the nipples. As she groaned from the feeling of the hardened flesh between her lips, Josephine shivered, arching to her touch.

While her ministrations, Josephine worked quickly on the ties of her breast band and inhaled deep as she looked at Cassandra bared in front of her. She let her hands, slowly brush across the revealed skin, drawing a sigh from Cassandra. A small smirk crept on Josephine’s lips, and she hooked a leg around Cassandra’s waist, shifting them around, rolling on top of her. Cassandra slightly chuckled, Josephine giggled, the sweet song of her voice. As Josephine’s eyes lingered on her, Cassandra could not help but blush under her gaze.

"You are magnificent", Josephine told smiling.

"I am not sure - ", Cassandra started, but Josephine pressed a kiss on her lips, silencing those doubting words.  

Josephine began to explore the expanse of her skin placing kisses on the scar Cassandra had on the left jaw, and kept going down her neck. She lingered a moment on the collarbone and moved down onto the breasts.

"Maker", Cassandra breathed as Josephine slightly nibbled her skin there. Slowly, Josephine moved down the belly, placing kisses on several scars she had gotten through the years. She winced a little when Josephine brushed over one of her jagged scars.

"Is everything well?" Josephine asked, rising to look into her eyes.

"Yes", Cassandra said under her breath. "No one has just ever -"

"If you do not wish me to - "

"No, please do", Cassandra said closing her eyes. She felt suddenly awkward. 

"Cassandra." Josephine cupped her cheek. "Please, open your eyes." 

Cassandra did open her eyes and saw the love in Josephine's. She could hear her own heart pounding hard. This was an unknown land where she had no control. She was a warrior, usually self-righteous, brash and blunt, but here, now - she felt strangely insecure. Of course, she was not a young maiden protecting her virtue, and knew exactly what she wanted to do, but Josephine was exquisite, and she herself, was scarred by battles. 

“You have a beautiful body, Cassandra”, Josephine told her smiling. "Ti adoro. Sono pazza di te", she continued in Antivan. Cassandra understood enough Antivan to know what Josephine had just told her.

“Crazy?”

Josephine looked at her, head slightly tilted on the side. “Completely.”

“I love you”, Cassandra whispered smiling as she sat up, hugging Josephine against her chest. She kissed her deep with longing lips and tongue, tangled her hands into Josephine’s silky hair. Carefully, she picked up the pins and unbraided her hair into wild curls that fell down onto Josephine’s freckled shoulders. 

As their kiss deepened, Josephine shifted and withdrew herself for a moment. She stepped out of the bed and untied her pants, slowly removed them in front of Cassandra's following eyes, revealing her beautiful shapes. Seductively, she swayed her hips as she let her smallclothes fall at her feet. Slightly blushing she remained still for a moment, letting Cassandra to take in the view.  

Cassandra’s eyes were transfixed at her. She was trying to comprehend that this incredible woman trusted her so thoroughly and was giving herself to her completely. She sat breathless in front of this truth. 

Smiling widely, Josephine climbed back on the bed and hooked a finger in the waist of Cassandra’s pants. Cassandra swallowed and watched how Josephine pulled them down, baring her completely. 

“Ah, no underwear. How convenient.” Josephine’s eyebrows rose with amusement. “I thought Sera was joking.”

Cassandra cleared her throat and could only but smile awkwardly at her discovery. She looked at Josephine’s darkened eyes watching her with such want in them. She was aware her thigh had the new, big scar that did not look all that attractive, but Josephine was clearly not turned off by it. It was relieving. She pulled Josephine back onto her lap, into her arms and kissed her again. She let her hands slowly travel down her back, onto her ample hips, cherishing every inch under her fingers, taking delight in the feeling of Josephine’s skin, not breaking the kiss. 

She felt feverous, Josephine’s beautiful shape pressed against her. She wanted her - wanted all of her. She brushed her fingers along her generous thighs, and Josephine let her explore. Josephine’s body was so opposite of her own. It was lush and deliciously curved. As she slowly mapped the skin under her touch, moving onto her lower belly and down again, she felt the soft curls of Josephine's. She was guided by her instincts, wanted to feel her the way she had never experienced before.

Suddenly, she hesitated and stilled herself, making a slight withdrawing motion. But Josephine’s hand was quickly upon hers, holding it still. They withdrew from the kiss, and she saw Josephine with her endearing smile looking at her. They lingered like this for a while, their breathing heavy between them. 

“I want you to touch me”, Josephine told her, voice husky with desire. She gently placed her forehead on Cassandra’s, and then, slowly pressed her hand lower, so Cassandra could reach her.

Cassandra let out a gasp as she felt her velvety softness for the first time. Her heart was racing, and with gentle questioning fingers she touched her. Josephine let out a small sound of pleasure, a beautiful song to her ears. 

“My love”, she whispered into Josephine’s ear while cherishing her body in her arms.

As she continued, it did not take long for Josephine’s breathing to be frantic, and she kissed Cassandra fervently. She wrapped her arms around Cassandra’s neck, moved against her hand, and Cassandra lost herself in the moment. There was only Josephine’s warmth, her body against hers, their hot breath on each other’s mouths. 

Slightly breathless, Josephine withdrew from the kiss. Her eyes fluttered from pleasure, but she forced herself to speak. “As wonderful as this is... I would like to ...”, she began, but in the end she just decided to softly push Cassandra on the bed. When Josephine placed a thigh between her legs, Cassandra shivered and could do nothing but to grab the sheets beneath her. As their legs and arms entangled, Josephine whispered into her ear, sweet words mixed in common and Antivan.

Cassandra could have never imagined, even in her wildest dreams, how it would feel like to make love to Josephine. She had imagined things, but no - nothing could have ever prepared her for the feeling of their bodies entwined, skin on skin, breath on each other, the wet heat between them, or the tender smiles, gentle touches and burning kisses.

Josephine was passionate and thorough, expressing her love profoundly, and Cassandra felt finally at ease. She was someone to place trust in herself, had been like that since she was a child. But with Josephine she felt safe. 

When once again, Josephine began moving down along her body, kissing, sucking and nibbling her skin, Cassandra let her. With small flicks of her tongue, Josephine past the neck, circled the breasts, went down her belly and played with her small curls. 

Cassandra’s heart was racing as Josephine hooked an arm around her leg, placing kisses on her inner thigh, trailing fingers on the other. Cassandra’s body shivered with anticipation, and Josephine glanced at her, the beautiful eyes seeking permission. 

Cassandra gave her a faint smile, and grabbed the sheets tighter as Josephine opened her legs wider and placed herself between them. A small part of Cassandra was not sure if she was ready for such a thing. This was something she had never experienced before, had only read it from books. But the words on paper could not do justice to how it felt. The soft groan passing her lips made her blush, but she arched her back as Josephine moved her tongue along her heat, quickly deciding, she wanted this. She pushed herself to meet Josephine’s touch and surrendered to her completely. 

Her vision went black at her release, and she heard a cry, low and distant, which she realized to be her own. She was panting and shuddering when she opened her eyes, seeing Josephine resting her cheek against her thigh. She gave her a small smile feeling all flushed, and Josephine was fast along her side kissing her. She could taste herself on Josephine’s lips and realized thinking how it would feel like to taste her. Even the thought of it was intoxicating. 

She shifted in Josephine’s arms, pushing herself up. Josephine’s eyes were tender, smiling as she looked at her.  

“You are a wonder”, Cassandra murmured and placed another kiss on her lips. “I want to try… to do it to you.”

Josephine’s look turned into a surprise. "It is not necessary. You must not feel obliged.” 

“I do not”, Cassandra told with a soft voice while tracing shapes on Josephine’s chest. “I want to.” 

As she told these assuring words, Josephine smiled, and Cassandra kissed her again. She climbed on top of her, let their bodies slide together, loving the feeling of Josephine’s heated skin beneath her.  

To punctuate her actions, Cassandra placed kisses all along her path down, slowly cherishing every inch of Josephine’s skin. She caressed her breasts, kissed her way down her soft belly, the sweet curves of her body.

When she reached the place between her lover’s legs, her heart pounded hard from both excitement and anticipation. She was completely intoxicated by her, her scent and the softness of her skin as she trailed her fingers along her thighs. Josephine was all this time looking at her, and Cassandra gave her a smile. 

As she finally lowered herself between Josephine's legs, and this incredible woman opened herself for her, she lost herself in the moment, only wanting to give pleasure for her. Instinctively, she tried her best, not fully sure how it was done, but when Josephine threw her head back on the bed and arched to her touch, letting out encouraging sounds, she found her way.  

She found herself drunk of her scent, her taste, warmth and softness. She felt Josephine’s fingers tangling into her hair, and her own hand sought for a place, first grabbing her thigh, then moving down along it. She felt the heat of Josephine’s entrance under her touch and was intrigued. Would she dare?

She was so far gone in her adoration for Josephine, that she did dare, slowly press a finger inside her. Josephine gasped, but it quickly turned into a moan, as Cassandra furled and unfurled her finger, still paying attention with her mouth. It took some time and effort, as well as some fumbling moments, but when she found back the pace, dove into Josephine’s wonderful heat, she made her finally wriggle under her touch. When Josephine let out her sweet sound of release, it was the most beautiful reward she could receive. She watched the woman she loved so dearly, to come undone beneath her touch and found herself in awe by the sight. 

“You are full of surprises, my love.” She heard Josephine’s voice husky from relaxation. Josephine opened her eyes to meet Cassandra’s gaze and pulled her up into her arms. She caressed gently Cassandra’s cheek before kissing her.

Cassandra’s words had completely failed her. She looked at Josephine with eyes full of love and adoration, blushing a little from her earlier actions, unable to comprehend her bluntness in her passion. As she buried her face into Josephine’s neck, feeling her soft hair against her skin, she heard Josephine’s breathing slow down, felt her hand stroking her short locks. 

“Cassandra?” Josephine asked softly.

Cassandra made a small questioning sound against her neck, and Josephine shifted, so she could look at her. 

“I feel quite speechless”, Cassandra told smiling.

“It was truly wonderful”, Josephine purred, kissing her nose giggling. “Completely worth waiting for.” 

“Truly”, Cassandra said breathless. “But I wish not to wait as long for the next time.” 

“Oh!” Josephine’s voice was full of laughter. “You can be sure to have me again, very soon.”

Cassandra felt happiness fill her. They pulled the blankets over, and Josephine wrapped her arms around her, pulling her closer. They stayed like that, in each other’s embrace, chuckling and giggling for a long time.  

They did it again several times that night, under the warm blankets, discovering each other over and over again. It was rather early morning than night when they began getting drowsy. They shared sleepy kisses and listened to each other breathing. Josephine’s eyes closed as she fell asleep, nuzzling against Cassandra’s chest, and Cassandra felt privileged and peaceful. Hearing Josephine’s breathing slow down to an even rhythm, made her eyes droop as well, and soon she drifted off.

* * *

 

Cassandra woke up before Josephine. She could not resist looking at her restful face, the little smile she had while she slept. Still, she resisted the urge to kiss her as she did not wish to wake her up. 

The fireplace had gone cold by the time, and Cassandra took her time to relight it. Then, she dressed up silently, and headed downstairs. She bid good morning to the innkeeper as she passed him on her way out. She wanted to take a look outside and some fresh air before getting breakfast for her and Josephine.

There were dark clouds on the sky, entailing a storm, but they failed to depress her. They might need to stay another night in Lydes if a storm was to arrive, but that would only mean more time for her and Josephine to be together.

She bought breakfast, enough to fill a large tray, and headed back upstairs. As she arrived at the door leading to their room, she realized to her surprise, it was ajar. Her brows furrowed as she was sure to have closed it after her. An odd feeling struck her. There was no reason for it to be open.  

She dropped the tray on the floor, grabbed the dagger she always carried in her boot and slid into the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (I've been fearing this chapter to come out as I truly hope to have handled it well...eek)
> 
> and I can't believe I actually left this to that cliffhanger :D
> 
> Thanks to everyone reading this story <3


	9. Nightmares

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It has been far too long since the last chapter and I feel bad for letting it hang like that (I had quite a writer's block)... I hope you will enjoy reading this. Thanks to everyone for sticking around! :)

It was pouring water from the dark grey sky. The sound of hooves on the gravel path echoed in Cassandra’s ears, the voices of the Inquisition soldiers fading to the background as she tried to keep herself steady on her horse. She felt like she had not taken a breath since the morning, her chest ached, a lump stuck in her throat was keeping her from speaking. She glanced at Josephine who was riding beside her, face hidden within the travel cloak, her head bent down to follow the movements of the horse’s mane.

There had been a moment when Cassandra was angry, for she had not known about the contract that had been placed on Josephine’s life. She had been angry to Leliana for not taking action, for not handling the matter quickly and silently, just like she always did. To her defence, Josephine had made her swear not to tell Cassandra. She had not wished to worry her, and Cassandra knew her own temper. She would have done something drastic if she had known.

Cassandra was a warrior, one that did not hesitate to draw her sword. She had seen so much death in her life that she herself sometimes wondered how she was able to sleep through the nights without seeing constant nightmares.

Josephine, on the other hand, was someone who always wished to avoid violence. Cassandra had met her in the beginning of the Inquisition, and she had always tried her best to find diplomatic solutions. She scribbled the words on parchments and let her quill do the work.

This time, however, she had not been quick enough with her diplomatic plans. The assassin had sneaked into their room, and though Josephine was still not able to tell how she had done it, she had killed the man. There was a nasty wound on her arm as a physical reminder of this encounter, but it had been her who had taken the dagger and stabbed the assassin’s heart.

An image of blood staining the wood under the corpse passed Cassandra’s mind, and the memory of the relief going through her body as she had glanced at the assassin one last time before they had fled the room. She looked at the road ahead of them. She could barely see through the wall of rain, her clothes were soaked, but she did not even realize.

Maker be blessed, she finally took a long breath and sighed. Josephine was alive.

* * *

_A limp body lying on the floor, blood pooling beneath. Cassandra stood still, and for a moment she could not move. She was sure her heart had stopped as well._

_Everything slowed down around her when she approached Josephine, who was still, her body painted with blood. Josephine sat on the floor on her knees, staring at the dead assailant in front of her._

_The knife Cassandra had been holding fell at her feet, and she sank to the floor beside Josephine, releasing a breath she had not realized holding. She was used to the smell of viscera and blood in battles, but the stink of iron in the room was overwhelming._

 

Cassandra stirred in her sleep. She felt the familiar tossing next to her, the mumbling that started in the middle of the night. It was completely dark, and she reached for the candle on her nightstand.

As the flame brought light into the room, she looked at Josephine who was curled into a ball beside her. There were pebbles of sweat on her forehead and her hair was mussed and damp. She called Josephine’s name softly at first, but the tossing and mumbling did not stop.

“Josephine”, she called again.

Then suddenly, Josephine opened her eyes and sat up fast, breathing heavily. Her eyes were not focusing, and she looked around in panic.

“My love”, Cassandra said calmly. “Everything is alright.”

Josephine looked at her, her eyes beginning to focus, a relief flushing across her face. She sighed, and Cassandra took her hand, pulling her into her arms. She kissed the top of Josephine’s head and gently brushed her damp hair.

It was several days since they had arrived back to Skyhold and were finally safely within its walls.

Whereas it was a blessing that Josephine was alive, the events had been too much for her to handle. On one afternoon as they were riding back to Skyhold, she had told a story from her youth, from the time she had been a bard. Never before she had explained why she had changed her path.

There had been an unfortunate encounter with another bard, one that was sent to kill Josephine’s patron. They had fought, and she had pushed the assassin down the stairs with fatal consequences. Josephine had told how she had reached for his mask and recognized him. It was then that Josephine had turned from this path, and dedicated herself for a career of diplomacy.

There were slight tremors going through Josephine’s body now, and Cassandra felt small sobs against her neck, felt the warm tears on her skin. She whispered sweet words into her lover’s ear and cradled her in her arms.

For days, Josephine woke up when the night was darkest, and every time she was there to hold her. Over and over again, she would take her into her arms and kiss the top of her head. She would whisper into her ear soothing words and tell her how much she loved her. Sometimes, they would lie awake in bed for hours, limbs twined, letting the darkness of the night envelope them in its soft blanket.

* * *

After her wound had healed, Josephine returned back to her duties as she insisted on doing so. Cassandra and Leliana shared looks across the room as Josephine sat down in front of the mountain of paperwork.

“The work will help me”, Josephine said, and they had no choice but to believe it would.

For a period of time, Cassandra did not think anything would help. She felt frustrated and incompetent for not being able to do anything about the matter, thus she spent most of her time on the training grounds.

“The blood on my hands. It will never go away. His eyes wide, my reflection on the glazed surface. I did not wish to kill him.”

Cassandra stilled and looked at the strange boy who swung his legs while sitting on the wall, his face hidden under the large hat he always wore.

“It hurts, it hurts her. I could make her forget.”

“Cole”, Cassandra said quietly. “I do not know if…”

“Forgiving herself will work better”, said Cole.

Cassandra sighed. She glanced at the courtyard where a group of soldiers were walking and speaking loudly. She grabbed her sword, and when she turned back to look for Cole, the boy had already vanished.

* * *

Sleepless nights passed. Sometimes Cassandra stayed up late, sitting in the armchair, looking at a book, not truly reading. She let her eyes wander to Josephine who was sleeping, her steady breathing carrying across the silent room. When she could not keep her eyes open anymore, she finally sighed and put away her book, climbed under the covers, taking one last look at her lover before blowing off the candle.

Then one morning, as Cassandra woke up to the sunlight across her cheeks, Josephine was smiling at her. Her gentle fingers brushed Cassandra’s tousled hair, and she pressed a kiss on her cheek, then softly on her lips. It was the first time there had not been nightmares and they had both slept the whole night through.

That morning, they made love, without words, softly, unhurriedly. It was like they had both woken up from a long, horrible dream, and the gentle touches wiped away the last bits of darkness they felt. They knew the world would require their time and it would try to rip them apart.

But for now, they were together, and alive.


	10. Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Inner Circle spends a well deserved night at the Herald's Rest.

“I would find it most romantic if Shae took a sword in hand and defended his love for me”, Dorian told smirking and received an elbow, gently to his side. Shae smiled at him from the corner of his eye.

“I would swoon from the excitement”, Dorian continued, dramatically leaning his body over the Inquisitor’s arms, pursing his lips, ready for a kiss.

Shae pressed his lips together to an awkward smile as he held Dorian’s weight. “I am sorry to tell you... but you are too heavy”, he chuckled.

“How rude”, Dorian huffed, standing up and winking at Cassandra who shook her head.

“You are beyond hope”, she told him.

Although weeks had passed since the duel in Val Royeaux, it still remained on the tip of everyone’s tongue. But what else could she have expected? Sometimes, all the fuss about it was annoying, but Dorian’s joking did not bother her.

The Inner circle was enjoying a rare night at the Herald’s rest. There was no one else at the tavern that night. Iron Bull and Blackwall carried more ale to the table were Varric and Sera were sitting and laughing. Sera was already quite drunk compared to the others. Her loud chatter carried around the tavern.

“Bull, you remember the blonde with big ditties, right?”

Bull sat down in front of her, his drink sloshing over the border of his mug. “I’ve told this before, but they have names too, you know.”

“I _knooow_ ”, Sera snickered, “but I can’t remember.”

“You should work on your memory”, Bull said. “Girls appreciate if you at least remember their name.”

“Yeah yeah. But you see, I…got some of _that_.”

Cassandra huffed. She did not wish to hear more of that discussion, thus she let it fade to the background as she looked around. Josephine was engaged in heated discussion with Cullen. The Inquisitor was currently talking with Leliana.

“I don’t remember having fun like this since... well, ages”, Dorian told, handing a glass of wine to her.

“That is entirely true”, Cassandra said smiling. “But only two days, and we will yet again be heading out to danger.” Emerald graves demanded their attention next. It would take again weeks to settle the problems in the area. There would be fighting, more demons, giants... She sighed and glanced at Josephine who was smiling, her hands gesturing excitedly as she talked. It would be the first time they were going to be apart since they had professed their love for each other.

“It must be difficult”, Dorian said, his face growing serious.

Cassandra came back from her thoughts to look at her friend.

“I cannot imagine how it would be like to leave Shae behind...or to stay at Skyhold while he is out on the field”, Dorian continued.

Cassandra sighed again and took a sip from her wine. “I do not wish to think about that now. It is too lovely night to dwell on such dark thoughts. Tonight we shall celebrate friendship and all the happy things we have”, she said, and a smile returned to her face.

Dorian raised his glass and smiled at her. “Truer words have not been spoken.”

They kept on chatting, drank more wine, and at some point, they joined in the discussion with Josephine and Cullen.

“Time for Wicked grace!” Varric’s voice carried over the chatter. “It’s the time we got some action.”

When the crowd began to move to the table, Dorian looked around. “Where is Sera?” he asked. “She was just there a moment ago.”

Cassandra looked around. “Perhaps she left to find the woman with…large breasts?”

Dorian laughed. “I think you might have had quite a few drinks tonight, Cassandra.”

 

They all gathered around a long table and pulled out their coin purses.

“Tsk tsk, you shall not sit next to each other”, Dorian pulled Cassandra up from her chair and sat her down at the end of the table, taking her place beside Josephine. “We don’t want any scheming. “

Cassandra frowned at him. Shae took a place on the other side of the table, opposite of Dorian. The others had already settled on their chairs.

“I hope I recall the rules”, Josephine smiled. “It’s been a while since we played a game of Wicked grace.”

“Are three drakes better than a pair of swords?”, Cassandra wondered. “I can never remember.”

“Seeker”, Varric said. “Just don’t show anyone your hand. That rule also includes announcing it to the table.”

“I would not…”, she told narrowing her eyes at him.

“There’s a crown on his head, but a sword too. His head didn’t want either”, that was Cole, under his oversized hat.

“Don’t talk to the face cards, kid”, Varric told smiling at the boy.

“I can’t stay long”, Cullen said, looking slightly uncomfortable. “I still have a thousand things to do tonight.”

“What would you have to do at this time of the night - after so much ale?” Leliana asked smirking. “A woman?”

“No”, Cullen looked at her, blushing, which received some chuckling around the table.

“A man, then?” Leliana continued, now smiling innocently.

Cullen rubbed at his neck and sighed. “Maker.”

Varric chuckled. “Curly, I am not an expert”, he said, “but isn’t that blasphemy? What do you think, Cassandra?”

Cassandra laughed. “Why would you ask me?” she said dryly. “Commander may _do_ whomever he likes. I’ve had too many drinks tonight to care about such things.”

That received a chorus of laughter around the table, and Cullen buried his face deep into his hands.

“Curly, if any man in history needed a hobby, it’s you”, Varric laughed and patted him on the shoulder. Then he handed the deck of cards to Josephine. “Go ahead, deal us in.”

Josephine took the cards and leaned back on her chair. “Dealer starts. Ooh...I ...believe…”, she was hesitating. “I’ll start at...three coppers! Do you think that’s too daring? Maybe I’ll make it one...No! Boldness! Three it is!”

Iron Bull threw his coin on the table and leaned over. “Seriously?” He roughed. “Who starts at three coppers? Silver, or go home.”

Blackwall placed his coin on the table. “Sounds good, I’m in.”

“Bolder the better, right? I’m in”, that was Dorian.

“I am in as well”, Cassandra told.

“Me too”, Varric said, throwing a coin of silver on the table. “What about you, Freckles? Are you in?” he asked Shae.

Shae placed a silver on the table. “Please, remember, I’m still new to this game.”

“Don’t worry”, Varric smiled. “You’ll pick it up in no time.

When they all had placed their bets, the game could begin, and it was more fun than Cassandra had remembered. The best thing of all was the moment they all shared together.

 

While playing the game, they shared funny stories. The ale kept flowing, and the chatter grew louder as the night went on. Even Cullen ended up finally laughing.

“Alright, I have a story”, Shae told suddenly, gaining everyone’s attention. “I’m tipsy enough to finally, come clean about something.”

“Ooh, confessions!” Dorian chuckled.

“Even you don’t know about this”, Shae told mysteriously. “It happened before you joined. ”He cleared his throat and took another sip of his wine. “It was the very beginning of the Inquisition, my hand was burning, and I was alone in the chantry hallway. I thought cold would help, so I tried using magic to cool it.”

“I have a hunch where this is going”, Leliana said, leaning back on her chair.

“Well...”, Shae continued, looking at her apologetically, “the anchor was making my magic unstable, and I wasn’t used to it.”

“ _You_ did it!” Josephine pointed a finger at him.

“Yes I did”, Shae told. “I was the one who froze the entire corridor.”

Leliana and Josephine exchanged looks across the table. “And we tried everything to find out who was vandalous enough to do such a thing”, Leliana said.

“I remember hearing voices approaching behind the door and had just enough time to sneak… or better to say slide... to the room next to the war room, to hide”, Shae told chuckling. “I have to admit, it was not easy.”

“I can imagine”, Leliana laughed. “When I entered the hallway with three nobles who were ready for their meeting with the Ambassador, all of them slipped and fell on top of each other onto the frozen floor.”

“I heard screaming and opened my office door”, Josephine continued, giggling. “It was terrible...Three nobles on all fours, trying to crawl to reach something to help them stand.”

Now they were all laughing around the table.

“Excellent!” Dorian pointed. “I’m sure they all deserved it.”

“We spent two days defrosting the hallway”, Leliana said smirking. “But it was all worth it.”

“I must agree”, giggled Josephine. “But the Inquisition would be ruined if anyone found out it was you.”

* * *

“And the dealer takes everything!” Josephine stated at the end of another hand. “I win again.”

Cullen frowned at her and leaned closer, over the table. “Deal again”, he said. “I figured out your tells, Lady Ambassador.”

Josephine leaned closer as well, slightly tilting her head. “Commander! Everyone knows a lady has no tells.”

“Then let’s see if your good fortune lasts one more hand.”

Others chuckled when Cullen threw thunderous glances at Josephine across the table. Cassandra smiled too. Josephine was in her element, and Cassandra took all the joy watching her.

* * *

When nearly everyone had already folded their cards, Cullen and Josephine were staring at each other. Josephine had an innocent smile on her face as she glanced at her cards again.

“All in”, Josephine told, looking at the Commander.

“I bet my clothes for this one”, Cullen grinned. “Lady Ambassador, I know you are bluffing.”

“It’s not even your turn yet”, Iron Bull laughed.

“What about you Seeker?” Varric asked.

Cassandra glanced at her cards once more, not believing her eyes. She had the best hand anyone could have in the game, she was sure of that. “I am in”, she said finally and pushed all her coins to the center of the table, receiving a series of astonished gasps.

“This is getting interesting”, said Dorian and drank from his wine.

“I’ll pass”, Shae told and placed his cards on the table.

“So then?” Varric said, looking at Cullen.

“ _All_ your clothes?” Cooed Josephine, not letting her eyes leave the Commander’s.

“ _All_ of them”, Cullen said.

Josephine smiled and shrugged her shoulders. “Very well then”, she said. “You all heard him.”

“Show the cards!” Iron Bull roared.

As they did, everyone could see that Josephine had absolutely nothing. Cullen laughed when he slammed his cards on the table. “Well this hand is mine!” he triumphed.

“Not so fast, Commander”, Cassandra told smiling as she laid her hand on the table. “I think it is mine.”

Everyone stretched their necks across the table to see her cards, and the laughter started gradually rise among the friends.

“I think we have a winner then”, Josephine smiled and turned to Cassandra who was still baffled by the result. “You won the whole pot!” she sang. “I knew you could do it, my love!” Then she tilted her head at Cullen. “I am afraid you were right after all.”

Cullen rubbed at his neck, looking at Cassandra’s cards, not believing his eyes.

“Still”, Josephine continued through the noise of laughter, staring at Cullen in the eyes, smiling smugly, “you have lost your garments.”

“Strip them off already!” Iron Bull shouted since Cullen just sat still.

Cullen looked around the table and rubbed at his face. “Maker”, he breathed and began to remove his coat.

“It comes off. I didn’t know it came off”, Cole said when Cullen was sitting bare naked on his chair.

“Don’t say a word, dwarf”, Cullen growled, side-eyeing Varric who was laughing hard.

“Here, Seeker!” Varric threw the Commander's furry coat to Cassandra. “It’s yours now.”

“And what am I supposed to do with it?”

“Put it on, of course”, Dorian said.

“I most certainly will not”, Cassandra protested.

“Oh do it, Cassandra!” Leliana chuckled.

“Do it! Do it! Do it!” Shouts began to carry around the table.

She must have been truly drunk that night, because she did. There was a slight smile on her face as she dressed up in the Commander’s uniform. The whole thing was quite amusing after all. As she caressed the fur around her neck, she looked at the others. “Happy now?” she huffed, and received yet again a series of laughs from the others.

Cullen looked uncomfortable. “May I borrow something to cover myself. I would very much like to retreat to my quarters.”

“No, you may not”, Leliana smirked. “Rules are rules.”

“Maker’s breath, I would appreciate if you all could at least look away so I can stand up from this chair.”

Everyone looked at each other and nodded. “I think we can do that”, Blackwall said.

“I do not wish to witness the Commander’s walk of shame back to the barracks”, Cassandra told.

“But we can’t promise for the people outside”, Josephine giggled.

So as they all looked away, Cullen took his leave and disappeared butt naked to the night. Cassandra saw Dorian take a peak just before Cullen was out of the door, and raised an eyebrow at him while he received the smiling Inquisitor’s elbow to his side. Dorian chuckled.

“Look who has been here the whole time”, Leliana laughed, pointing at a foot sticking out from under the table.

“Sera!”

Shae kneeled on the floor and poked his friend who was apparently, fast asleep. “She’s alright”, he said after examining her breathing.

They pulled her up, and as they did so, she woke up slightly, slurring something incoherent. Shae volunteered to walk her upstairs, to her room.

There was a sudden clang at the door, and loud noises as The Chargers burst in the tavern.

“Hey guys!” Bull retorted. “Glad you decided to stop by.”

“We wouldn’t miss a great party”, Krem told.

The Chargers had seemingly started the night with drinks already. Their happy chatter merged with the others, and music began to fill the air as they pulled out some instruments and began to play.

Iron Bull and Blackwall decided to arm wrestle, which drew Varric and Dorian along as well. Bull won Blackwall easily. They laughed and wrestled again as Dorian and Varric took a measure of each other. Dorian was a good opponent to Varric, but the countless times of firing a crossbow had made its work on Varric’s arms.

“Cassandra!” Varric’s voice carried over the music after their match, and she turned to look at him.

“We never got the best of each other, thanks to Freckles’ interference”, he laughed, referring to the spat they had had, after Hawke’s arrival to Skyhold. “Let’s do it now.”

“Varric, there’s no need to…”

“If you want to forfeit...”, Varric said and shrugged.

Cassandra took a step closer. “I will not.”

Varric smiled. “Well, then”, he said and placed his arm on the table, gesturing at Cassandra to join him.

Cassandra glanced at the others who had mostly stopped what they were doing and were now looking at them.

“Fine”, she huffed and sat on the other side of the table. Her elbow hit the wood, and she grabbed Varric’s hand in a firm grip. “Show me what you got then.”

Bull banged the table with his hand, and the others cheered as they began to wrestle. Cassandra gritted her teeth when Varric’s arm twisted hers, pushing it slightly closer to the table. She held tighter to Varric’s grip and pushed her limits.

Varric grunted, and looked at her, grinning. “I did not expect less”, he breathed between his teeth.

Cassandra did not answer, but applied all her strength to her arm that gradually, began to push down Varric’s, finally resulting to a sound of his knuckles hitting the wood. She pulled her sweaty hand away, raising up from her chair, a small smile on her lips.

Varric chuckled. “I think I’m happy Freckles got between us.”

After that match, she had to face Iron Bull as the last opponent, but that wrestle was quickly settled for Bull’s account. No one could best him. Had anyone seen the size of his arms?

 

The Chargers kept on playing music, and people danced. When Leliana and Josephine finished dancing together, Leliana picked up a lute and joined the players. Her voice was beautiful as always when she began to sing.

Cassandra danced with Josephine, Shae with Dorian, Krem with Dalish. And when the song switched to another, Blackwall came and bowed to Cassandra.

“Can I have this dance, my lady?”

And so Cassandra let go of Josephine’s hand and took his instead. She was carried across the tavern floor by strong warrior arms, and could not help but be pleased in the moment.

Josephine, on the other hand, grabbed Shae’s hand and robbed him from Dorian.

* * *

“I must admit, this fur coat suits you”, Josephine giggled. She was sitting on Cassandra’s legs, both of them resting after a long time of dancing. “But it does not smell very nice”, she added.

Cassandra laughed. She was still drunk, a slow tiredness taking over her body, beginning to make her sleepy. She buried her face into Josephine’s neck and placed a small kiss there. The sun was already rising, you could tell it from the pale light coming through the windows. The music had stopped; Bull, Blackwall, Stitches, Dalish and Skinner were talking, their voices low now; Dorian and Shae had disappeared somewhere upstairs; Rocky, Grim and Krem had fallen asleep at the table. Krem mumbled something they could not understand.

“I have a feeling you might have affected the outcome of the game”, Cassandra said and looked at Josephine with a small smile.

“I do not know what you are talking about”, Josephine told smirking, and tightened her arms around her.

Suddenly, Cole appeared at the table where the three men were snoring. “Her voice, beautiful and soothing. Her face, lovely like a morning sun. Spending my days watching, listening. Will she ever notice me?” Krem moved and mumbled again. Then Cole was gone as fast as he had appeared.

It was Leliana who approached them now, with a smirk on her face. “Look what I found”, she sang, holding up her hand. There was a piece of clothing hanging from her fingers, and they could quickly, be identified as the smallclothes Cullen had let fall to the ground at the end of Wicked grace.

“Leliana?” Josephine said, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Yes?”

“You are not planning on doing what I think, are you?”

“What will you do with them?” Cassandra asked curiously.

Leliana giggled. “You will see in the morning”, she said with a hushed voice and disappeared through the door to the courtyard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you Luinquesse for Beta-reading. Also, the credit for inventing the story that is told by the Inquisitor, goes to her. And I take no credit for some direct quotes from the game I have used in this chapter.
> 
> Thank you all for leaving Kudos and for taking your time to comment. <3


	11. War

“Maker take you!” Cassandra shouted, cutting a neck of another red templar, its head dropping to the mud. Another was stunned by the force of her shield, and soon was sliced through its abdomen with a swift motion of her sword.

The sun in Arbor Wilds was high in the sky. It burned through her armor, sweat trickling down her back. She wiped her face with the back of her gloved hand, smearing the blood that was not her own.

Vivienne and the Inquisitor casted barriers around them when a group of enemies approached running and roaring, blades pointed at them. Cassandra charged, letting out a war cry, Blackwall and Iron Bull right behind her. Sparks of lightning and threads of ice magic flew over, arrows piercing through several templars. 

They cut through countless of enemies, and it felt like they had been fighting forever. Cassandra’s armor was coated with blood, her shoulder ached, a cut on her arm stinged when she moved.

“You must push forward!” Iron Bull roared over the noise of battle. “I’ll stay with the Chargers and help Leliana and her men!”

“Are you sure?” Blackwall shouted.

“Yes! Get to the temple before Corypheus!”

Cassandra cut down another red templar. “Monsters!” she spat and climbed over the body. “Let’s go!” she yelled and pointed forward with her sword.

They found an opening where the group could pass and continue. Still, they had to kill multiple enemies before they could elude the battle. 

The jungle continued forever, and the heat was unbearable, but they pushed on. Once the sounds of fighting dissipated behind them, new shouts and noises of battle carried over from further ahead. They found Cullen and his soldiers fighting against a group of enemies. As soon as they reached them, Cassandra and Blackwall charged into the group, and countless of red templars fell again.

After the fight, Cullen was left behind and the Inquisitor’s party headed north. They could see the temple from afar and hurried to reach its gates. But as they approached their destination, they got ambushed by yet another group of red templars. The enemies flanked them. One charged at Varric, pushing him out of the path. Cole vanished and Sera put an arrow through one’s eye, one that had just tried attacking Cassandra from behind.

The Inquisitor froze multiple enemies to their place and Vivienne cut with her spirit blade through the one that was towering over Varric. Varric stumbled back to his feet, holding his leg that had a nasty looking cut on it. At the same time, Cole appeared at the end of the path, stabbing two completely oblivious enemies from behind. 

Just when they thought they finally had the higher ground, new enemies appeared from the jungle, roaring and charging at them. 

“Inquisitor!” Cassandra yelled. “You must get to the temple! Take a party with you. I will stay with the others and hold the templars at bay.”

Blackwall joined to cover the Inquisitor’s path. Dorian ran at his side as well, blasting an enemy who was charging at Solas. Solas casted an ice wall to cut the red templars’ path, and the others remained behind. 

“Okay, let’s kill these shiteballs”, Sera yelled and launched a series of arrows onto the enemy. 

Cole vanished and reappeared once again to backstab multiple enemies while Varric fired his crossbow. Vivienne tried protecting them with a strong barrier, but there were too many enemies and too few of them. 

As Cassandra sliced through yet another templar, her vision blinded by the blood on her face, she shouted at the others: “Keep them away from me, for a moment!” 

“What you doing?” Sera yelled as she fired another set of arrows onto the enemy. “I thought you were the one keeping enemies from us.”

“I am”, Cassandra stated, planting her shield to the ground. She kneeled down and pushed the blade of her sword to the mud. She bent her head and focused all her energy to the red templars. It had been forever since she had done this, and definitely never in this scale. Would it even work? She could not know. But she had to try anyway.

She closed her eyes and reached, sensing the lyrium within the enemy. She let herself go, felt the lyrium all around her, and then she pushed herself through the defences and set the lyrium on fire. She kept her eyes closed to focus on her task. She could hear distant screaming of suffering, Sera’s voice swearing, felt a flash of barrier around her. Slowly, it all faded, disappearing to the background. 

Then, everything was silent.

* * *

The sun was too bright when she slowly opened her eyes, just to see Vivienne bent over her.

“Oh dear Maker, you are alive”, Vivienne breathed and placed her palm on Cassandra’s chest when she tried to raise herself.

“That must have been one hell of a blast!” Iron Bull roared. By now, the Chargers had fought their way to the temple as well. “I knew you had some held back strength within you, Cass.”

Cassandra tried to stand up, but fell back to the ground. Her body was sore and limp, the armor too heavy for her to carry.

“Do not try to move”, Vivienne said. “You must have spent all of your strength. You must rest now. Bull, will you carry her to the camp?”

“No!” Cassandra cried and stood up faster than anyone could have imagined. “I am completely capable of…”, she started but her feet did not comply, thus she fell again, though this time Bull was there to catch her. 

“Sorry Seeker, but you’re just gonna have to deal”, Bull said as he took her easily, onto his giant arms.

Cassandra let out a disgusted noise and surrendered to be carried. “Fine”, she huffed. “And don’t you dare snicker, dwarf, or I will take personal care that you will lose that limb of yours”, she threw at Varric who was smirking while holding his wounded leg.

* * *

The camp was buzzing with people. Soldiers’ wounds were taken care of, and everyone was running and helping others. Cassandra had passed out on the way to the camp but woke up to the healer’s touch when she was removing her armor.

They had carried her to a tent where the smell of herbs was overwhelming. She could barely move, and all the surroundings looked like in haze. Her eyes were heavy, everything was hurting. The sudden surge of anger she had had when waking up at the temple, had consumed every last drop of her strength. She dozed off several times, hearing people talking around her. Someone gave her a terrible liquid to drink, and at some point the healer used magic on her. 

Through darkness, a familiar voice, soft and gentle, called her name, though soon it got mixed with other voices. Then she dozed off again.

Something damp and cold touched her forehead, then wiped across her cheeks. The soft voice spoke again. “My love?”

Cassandra opened slowly her eyes and saw Josephine sitting beside her. With shaky fingers she reached for her hand. “Did they make it?” 

Josephine looked at her, a relief crossing her face. “Thank the Maker”, she sighed, cupping Cassandra’s face with her other hand. Then, her face grew serious. “There is no word yet”, she said.

Cassandra closed her eyes again and took a shaky breath. Even that hurt.

“You saved everyone”, Josephine continued, smiling faintly. “Varric told, if you hadn’t done what you did, many of you, if not all, would be dead.”

Cassandra was silent for a moment. “I...I hope the Inquisitor made it”, she said quietly.

“We can only wait”, Josephine said. A silence lingered between them, noises of the camp carrying into the tent. In the distance, someone was shouting in pain. She squeezed Cassandra’s hand and looked at her, eyes gleaming. “Maker”, she exhaled and leaned in to press a kiss on her lips.

Cassandra raised her shaky arms to wrap them around Josephine’s waist. Their kiss lasted for a long time. She could taste Josephine’s salty tears on her lips, felt her tremble slightly in her arms. When they finally withdrew from the kiss, Cassandra pulled Josephine even closer, burying her face amidst her soft hair. 

“I was so afraid”, Josephine sobbed against her neck. 

Cassandra caressed gently her back. “I love you, Josephine”, she whispered softly. “I love you so much.”

When they slowly parted, Josephine examined her. “Are you still hurting?” she asked, her eyes red.

Cassandra tried to move, her face turning into a grimace. “Apparently, yes”, she sighed. “But I will be fine.”

Suddenly Leliana’s voice carried across the camp. “They are back!” she shouted. “Inquisitor’s party is back at Skyhold!”

Josephine was quickly on her feet and rushing out of the tent. Cassandra heard their muffled voices outside, through the canvas, but could not make sense of what they were saying. How could they be already back in Skyhold? 

* * *

The Inquisitor’s party had apparently, gone through an eluvian and appeared at Skyhold, or so the message said. Leliana had written a quick reply carried by a raven, to Skyhold.

Later that same day, Cassandra sat in a carriage pulled by horses. Josephine was riding next to her, head covered with a thin shawl to protect from the burning sun. Cassandra sighed. She glanced around, seeing soldiers marching, sad faces bent to look to the ground. Countless carriages were pulled towards Skyhold. They were full of men and women. Some of them could sit on their own, some were gravely wounded, and too many would never return home.

Cassandra examined her hands and the sores and calluses on them. The soldiers had began to sing, their voices low and mourning. There were so many dead, so many lives lost to their cause. 

When would it all be over?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who's still having the patience to stick around and follow this story. I'm honored for all the Kudos and comments you've been leaving <3


	12. Calm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Big thanks to wonderful Linguini for beta-reading <3

 “This is absolutely fantastic”, Josephine sighed, closing her eyes, as they slowly rode on a narrow path through a forest. There was a grove nearby, with a clear water lake, and Josephine was excited to show it to Cassandra. 

The Inquisitor had recently returned from taming the dragon in Arbor Wilds, and for now, they were planning their next move. Nothing was truly happening while they tried to find out where Corypheus had fled. Thus the women had decided to take a day for themselves, which was so rare these days.  

Cassandra felt happy. The idea of a full day to spend only with Josephine was more than she dared to ask for, taking into account the circumstances. She let her mind wander and listened to the steady sound of hooves against the forest floor.

It was a short ride, after which they arrived at a beautiful grove with grass and colorful flowers, gentle wind from north indulging them with its warm embrace. The air was filled with buzzing of bees, the singing of crickets and birds. They settled their horses in the shade, under a tall weeping willow where they could eat grass and rest.  

The water was bright blue, reflecting the color of the sky and the white cotton clouds. Its surface was still, except for a sudden splash when a fish jumped up further from the shore line. They laid down a blanket on the grass full of flowers and placed the basket down on top of it.

“It is beautiful”, Cassandra said, smiling. 

“I thought you might like it”, said Josephine. She was already undressing herself. Cassandra’s eyebrows rose as Josephine threw her blouse on the blanket and pulled down her skirts. “Nothing you haven’t seen before, amore,” she laughed and made Cassandra blush, even after all this time together. 

Cassandra decided to follow her lead, unlaced her shirt and got rid of her breeches. Josephine was already running towards the lake, naked butt wiggling, and Cassandra chuckled, soon running after her. 

“Oh Maker!” Josephine screamed as she reached the water. “It’s so cold!”

“It’s a mountain lake, Jo,” Cassandra laughed. “It never really gets warm here.”

Cassandra could see Josephine’s teeth clattering. “You must dip yourself fully into the water”, she said, approaching her. She wrapped her arms around her waist and kissed her trembling lips. “Let us go together.”

“I can’t!”

“You can!” Cassandra laughed. “I’ll count till three.”

After a moment, Josephine agreed, giggling. Cassandra counted till two, pulling her into water before she had time to hesitate more. Josephine gasped, shivering in her arms. 

“You told you’d count till three, not two!” Josephine yelled at her. 

“I apologise, but that’s the proper way of doing it,” Cassandra said, kissing her again as they swung around, bodies entwined.  

“You’re cruel,” Josephine pouted at her, though a smile tugged at the corner of her lips. 

“But it’s better?” 

“Better,” Josephine hummed. “I’m slowly getting used to it.”

Since the water was so chilly, they could not stay in for long; thus they decided a swim to the center of the lake and back together was enough.

 

“Oh, I’ve missed swimming”, Josephine sighed when they were back at the shore and lying on the blanket, both enveloped within towels. “I’m so impatient to bring you to Rialto Bay. It will be so much warmer,” she continued with dreamy eyes. “You can’t imagine how warm the water is in Antiva. I can’t wait to be back there, once we are all done with the Inquisition matters.”

The idea of going to Antiva and meeting the Montilyet family filled Cassandra with both great joy and fright. How they would manage their lives after the Inquisition was yet to be discussed. Nothing was truly certain in a world like this where death lurked in every corner, where anything bad could happen any time. 

She had recently noted how Josephine spoke more and more about her family, and Antiva in general. It was clear to her now how badly her lover missed home. For Cassandra, it had never mattered where she was, for she had no place she could truly call home. It was always the cause that pulled her to a place. It had been that way the majority of her life. 

Still, she tried to understand the longing Josephine expressed. She listened to her stories about her home city. Detailed descriptions on what the harbor looked like, and how it smelled. How the sun painted the horizon with warm colors in the evening. She listened to her endless stories about the large Montilyet family and Josephine’s visions for the future. And she smiled.  

Furthermore, Cassandra had realized something that was completely new to her. She thought about her past and only relationship with Regalyan, a gallant young mage with whom she had traveled when she was young. She had loved him with all her fierce passion of her young heart, and though she knew one should never compare these things, she could not help but think how entirely different it was to be with Josephine.   

It had taken her a long time to get accustomed to her own feelings - she had doubted and questioned. But when she had finally let herself love freely and had given her heart to Josephine, she just knew everything about it was so right. 

It felt like coming home. 

“Oh, what a shame,” Josephine frowned at the basket. “One of the peaches got squashed on the way.” She turned to look at Cassandra who was watching her, smiling. “Sometimes, the way you look at me... I would pay a fortune to know your deepest thoughts,” she said then, not removing her eyes from hers. 

Cassandra smiled wider, taking a look inside the basket. “I think we have food enough without that peach.” She grabbed a loaf of bread and cut a piece for both of them.  

They ate breakfast, under the bright sun, listening to singing crickets and buzzing bees around them. They enjoyed their meal, watching birds fly over the lake against the blue sky, and they played the game of children, telling what shapes they saw in the groups of clouds. And when they spoke, they spoke about trivialities that would hardly matter to anyone else.

When their hands slightly touched across the blanket and their eyes met, Josephine leaned in to kiss her. Cassandra closed her eyes when soft lips brushed upon hers and Josephine’s hand sought for her neck, grabbing gently the braid which had escaped from its binding. She sighed when Josephine’s lips traveled lower, tracing down her jaw to the sensitive spot below her ear. 

“I love you,” Josephine whispered, making Cassandra shiver.  

They withdrew for a moment and looked at each other, Josephine’s eyes smiling at her. Cassandra’s heart clenched in her chest as her lover did not let go of the gaze.

“You have such beautiful eyes, my love,” Josephine said tenderly.

Cassandra blushed. From any other person, she would have taken it as bland way of trying to flatter her, but not when it was told by Josephine. Just seeing the certain look in Josephine’s eyes was able to send heat directly to her core.

She raised her hand to caress Josephine’s shoulder, letting the towel around her fall to the blanket. Then, she placed a soft kiss on her freckled skin, smiling as Josephine sighed at the touch. “I love you too,” she whispered, letting her lips trace towards Josephine’s neck. 

When their lips met again, the kiss was ardent and heady, like their feelings for each other. Soon, Cassandra’s towel was gone too, her back pressed to the blanket and Josephine’s soft thighs straddling her hips. Her hands sought for Josephine’s generous bottom as she lay down on top of her, kissing and kissing. Josephine was all softness and warmth, her body undulating upon hers.  

They withdrew for a moment, mostly to breathe properly, but also to look at each other. Josephine’s eyes were dark, her mouth curved into a sultry smile which made Cassandra shiver.  

“You are so beautiful,” Cassandra breathed, stunned as she was, running her fingers up and down Josephine’s backside.  

She gained a half-lidded gaze while Josephine’s hand began slowly travel down her body. It brushed over her breast, and caressed gently down her stomach. And when her hand reached the place between her thighs, Cassandra could not suppress the moan that escaped her lips at the touch of Josephine’s fingers on her wet heat. Slow circles were enough to make her writhe under her lover. 

She came easily and crashed hard, pulling a tuft of grass on her way back down from her peak. When the tremors died down, Josephine kissed her again and again, humming softly into her mouth.  

As they withdrew from the kiss and Cassandra saw the bundle of grass she was still holding, she burst into laughter, and Josephine laughed with her. She wrapped her arms around Josephine and flipped them around, kissing her deliberately. She slid her hand between Josephine’s thighs, reveling in the pleased sounds she gained from her… 

There was a sudden crackle, frighteningly familiar. Cassandra rose up and glanced at the sky, seeing the breach open, swirling green splitting the otherwise so bright blue sky.

“Cass…” Josephine breathed as Cassandra turned to look at her, her eyes mirroring the shock on her own face.

They were quickly on their feet, dressing up, not having the time to stay and pack their belongings. The horses sensed their distress as they saddled them again, and Cassandra could feel the all too familiar rush of blood in her veins. They climbed on their horses, and she glanced once more at the sky before they began their short and hurried ride back to Skyhold. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for leaving Kudos and Comments <3


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